Old friendship. Newer realization.
I (59F) had an old friend (56F) where our friendship started about 25 years ago. She was funny, smart and generous. But deeply judgmental of others. Anything from appearance to religion to parenting, she often had something negative to say. I called her out a few times but largely ignored it. In between she was compassionate and kind. I moved away-not too far. And lost touch. Then I realized that overall, the negativity outweighed the good stuff. I don’t want that in my life anymore. It came to a head when I was staying overnight and she got pretty upset that I didn’t agree with her religious beliefs. She got quiet then later in the night, she gathered my things to leave- said a polite goodbye. I saw her a few times after that. But a few years ago, I decided to not reach out anymore. I also avoided calls and texts. I feel bad that I ghosted. But I wouldn’t have any idea how to explain this to her. Note: she has lost a few other friends over the years, and I suspect this is why. I’m wondering if I should just let this lie as it is or try to explain. It would only hurt her though. And I feel like no good to either of us would come from it. But what do others think?