19, ADHD girl struggling with university
Hey guys, I just joined this page today! I've just been feeling pretty down lately in regards to my progress in university and I just wanted to vent my frustrations out to people that are like me.. (warning for word vomit, sorry)
For some context, I graduated in 2024 and immediately went into university with no break (mom refused to let me take one)
I performed HORRIBLY and barely scraped by the first 1 and a half years, I'm talking 2.0 GPA barely missing academic probation, terrible.
It was then, that I got diagnosed with ADHD alongside some other things like C-PTSD, anxiety and depression.
To help myself do better in my classes, I'm now taking only 2-3 classes per semester (average is 4-5), and I'm probably going to take 6 years or more to finish this 4 year course.
I feel absolutely horrible about it, considering some of my friends have already graduated (they took 2 year courses). I feel so stupid, lazy and like I'm just a waste of money honestly.
I feel like I'm falling behind on everything.. everyone around me knows what they're doing and actually moving on in life. Even with my accommodated schedules and such, I still feel like I'm not doing good enough to make up for the slower pace.
To make it even worse, I don't even LIKE what program I'm in.. I only chose it to make my mom happy (Bachelor of Science in molecular biology, I wanted to do something with digital art.. but I know its hopeless).
Every day I feel so much dread knowing that I have to keep studying stuff I don't even like, to get a job I won't even like, to do stuff I don't even like for the rest of my life.
I'm sorry for how long this post is, it's kinda ironic to post something this long in an ADHD subreddit, but I just wanted to vent my frustrations out.. thanks if you took the time to read it :)