u/Best-Award557

For Context. Fiancé and I have been together for 13 years now. He spent 10 of those in prison. I Decided to wait. I stood by him, supported him. He was just released 2 months ago. Prior to his prison sentence and us still in the dating stages, he told me he had slept with his "best friend" who is a female just months prior to us starting to date. I understand having friends of the opposite sex. My best friend is a male, I have never once crossed that line with him and never would. I feel if I had it would have changed the entire friendship.

During the entirety of the relationship with fiancé, he never really gave me the option to say that I am not ok with him still actively bringing this woman around. And he did. It's been a (her and I are a package deal) thing. I have never been ok with it. At the time I would have been able to voice my opinion about it he was fully supporting me and my 3 children so I kept my mouth shut to keep the peace. Meanwhile he was never on board with wanting to meet my best friend whom has always played a very important role in my life. It was a hard no.

Fast forward to today... Due to the conditions of his release and me caring for my mother, we are living in separate states. The relationship between him and his best friend is still ongoing. I have tried to remain supportive of him and ok with his best friend and him spending time together, talking on the phone, texting... without flipping out.. They communicate almost daily. About a week ago he decided he was going to go buy her a phone card because her phone was shut off. He told me about this. He was gone for 2 hours. One of those hours was accounted for. The other was not. I fell asleep waiting for him to call me back. We have location on one another. He was sitting on a side street down the street from her house for that extra hour. (she lives with family) He would not give an explanation.

I finally have reached my boiling point with him and her. I told him I could not deal with it anymore due to them having intimate relations in the past. (I feel) and told him that there is an emotional connection between the two them that I am not ok with. I really do feel that he loves her and would absolutely be with her rather than me had she given it the go ahead. I told him that he had to choose her or me. Since the time I told him this he has tried to get around the whole situation entirety without addressing the elephant in the room. This has gone on a week now. I have almost entirety quit talking to him because of this. I am angry. This more recent situation with him and her has made me feel extremely insecure and jealous. The distance does not help either. Finally this morning I told him if he does not choose then I will choose for him because I can no longer tolerate living like this. He said if that is how I feel about the situation then to go ahead and leave. He says as pertains to their relationship he has done nothing wrong.

My questions are many tbh. Has anyone else ever been in a similar situation? If so how did you handle it?? If you have not would you be ok with that type of situation? Is it possible that I am in fact the one over reacting? In your opinion do you think it's time for me to move on?? Why or why not?? Thanks so much if you took the time to read and/or respond. I apologize for the lengthy description and I could really use some real world advice.