My bd suddenly reappeared and now is threatening to take me to court for custody.
Hello I am a fulltime mom with a 5 month old boy. My son’s father has not been a real presence in our lives,until a few weeks ago. He just moved back to town no notice, just a hey I’m getting on a plane and I’ll see you tomorrow. The original plan due to him traveling for work and living out of state was him to call regularly and come visit every two months. Once our son was born he used his time off work as a vacation. He would leave me alone all day, shopping, hanging with friends etc. with no help 2 days after having a c section. Thankfully I have family in town who ended up taking care of me and the baby. He had taken a month off of work to help me recover and bond with our son. He left to a hotel over night 2 times just to not have to deal with us. Then as soon as he came back from hotel, took a shower then as he’s packing,telling me work needed him to come back early and leave right before Christmas. After He left my message and calls were constantly ignored. In about 4 months he talked to his son about 15 mins total on the phone, and never once without me having to instigate. He only cares when his family or friends around and puts on this super dad act when convenient.
Now he has returned all of a sudden because he’s not been working, little does he know I’ve been aware he’s been getting unemployment for months. He’s been lying constantly about how busy he is with work that’s why he could never call. When in reality he’s visited his girlfriend who lives in another state from him multiple times over the last few months instead of his newborn son he claims to have missed so much. He’s only been back a few weeks but has threatened to take me to court for 50/50 and I’m scared for my baby. He doesn’t even know how to take care of our son, let alone change his diaper properly. I’ve never not once told him he couldn’t see his son. His issues is that I won’t let him go without me being present. He is demanding I let him take our 5 month old baby overnight for multiple days at a time. I’ve made an effort with him to try to teach him but he thinks he knows everything. He was supposed to move back and live in the home he pays for. You’d assume he’d want to see his son everyday being gone so long. But he rather move in with his parents so he doesn’t have to be alone with me because he can’t handle me not shrinking for him anymore. I keep as calm and unbothered as possible. He is verbally an emotionally abusive so I can’t give him the satisfaction in seeing me upset. He is an alcoholic who drinks sun up to down. I’m willing to work with him but it’s hard to do so when he acts so childish and untrustworthy.
I’ve reached out to legal aid center but was unable to find a pro bono lawyer. I have documented messages and a timeline to show his instability. I know there’s no way he’ll ever get full custody of our son. I’m just afraid to leave such a tiny baby with him unsupervised, especially since I’m breastfeeding on demand. Please looking for advice on how to go forward with someone like this.