Ive put in too much work to give up now
Hello,
I first got into manifesting in 2022, when I was in the worst situation in my life. This situation involved a person, and could not be solved smoothly unless that person came forth and solved it. I felt so helpless because I knew if i did anything the problem would get worse, so I prayed that it would solve itself. Then I discovered manifestation and tried to manifest the problem being solved but didnt see movement. Then I discovered Sammy Ingram and applied her methods, and after 2 weeks the problem was solved perfectly!! Thats when I knew that this is real! Some notes are that thinking opposing thoughts (like that the problem wouldnt be solved) physically hurt my stomach and made me sick. Therefore, it was easy to recognize when I had them and I could affirm and visualize to soothe myself. Then I would continue to affirm till satisfied. Also, since this was concerned with a person it was easy because there are 24 hours in a day and I have no clue what the other person could be doing. So therefore they could be solving the problem at any time.
So then I decided to manifest my desired body. Keep in mind I have had eating disorders and body issues for years. So when I was manifesting it, i tried to keep my mind in living in the end but noticing opposing thoughts was so hard because I was already so used to thinking about my body negatively. Also, I think about my appearance indirectly pretty much 24/7. As a result, it was difficult for me to keep living in the end. I decided maybe I should read neville and try to understand manifesting more. I was also always reading reddit posts, watch youtube vids, and reading nevilles books. So I guess I was always in “research mode” instead of “practice mode”. I did not get success with my appearance, so I tried manifesting other objects but still no success. This went on for 4 years.
Its 2026 now, But i still believe in manifestation. Its like I NEED IT. Like I refuse to accept that its a lie or a joke or its too hard for me. I need it to work for me. I think about manifestation and read about it every single day. Its a part of me now.
Anyway, I decided to let go of my appearance for now, and try to manifest a person like my first success. My cousin wanted to get a certain expensive cosmetic procedure done, and I did not want her to. Why? Simply because I didnt want her to. I think its a mistake but I dont wanna fight with her. So for 2/3 weeks I kept affirming everyday and did lullaby and kept my thoughts in check. It felt so easy since like i said it concerned another person so it felt easy. Like she could easily change her mind about the procedure. Her procedure was to be done on 21 May, and I really thought that Id get a message from her saying she decided not to do it. But instead she sent a selfie of her in the operating room saying she did it.
I truly felt like my thoughts were in check 95% of the time. Even when they werent, I would say to myself “ it doesnt matter if my thoughts are in check or not bc she is not gonna do it either way”
But I still failed. Does anyone have any feedback?
I really want and need manifestation to work. I want to change my life. I believe in it. I have believed in it for 4 years, I cant give up now.