u/BigMamaOclock

Does anyone know if their grandparents where bad people?

I hate the way my mom is and how she treats us, but then I hear about how her parents treated her....my grandparents would literally be in jail in the western world. There was absolutely no empathy for their children. I sometimes wish cutting people off was more normalized in African families, because maybe then they would actually fear losing their children.

Now that her mother is a devoted Christian, everything has been forgotten. My mom sends her money and talks to her with a smile, as if she didn't treat my mom horribly and openly hate her.

Maybe if my mom had been treated better, I wouldn't have inherited all of that trauma and its so weird because my grandma is so nice to me.

I’m seeing a lot of people share names they like, and there are always people saying, “That’s so common!” or “No originality!”

But what’s wrong with liking a common name? A name should be about the meaning behind it and how it speaks to you, not how popular or uncommon it is.

Now, I don’t plan on getting pregnant anytime soon, but LORDDDD, I’m seeing so many stories.

-The in-laws wanting to choose the baby’s name and the mother having no say.

-Family pressuring the parents to give the baby the same name as another family member because of “tradition.”

-Mother is in the hospital giving birth, and family members are waiting outside putting pressure.

-Mother newly home, and suddenly everyone wants to visit to only hold baby.

-An elder deciding you “don’t know shit” and basically taking over because they think they know better.

I even saw a story about a grandma trying to baptize a child WITHOUT the parents’ consent!? Whyyyyyy do some people see other's children as property.

Im just getting into makeup but have to buy foundation i have combination skin and i wouldn't say im going for full glam everyday. In all the tutorials i watched no one uses foundation sticks so does anyone here do?

Im just getting into makeup but have to buy foundation i have combination skin and i wouldn't say im going for full glam everyday. In all the tutorials i watched no one uses foundation sticks so does anyone here do?

Mi piacerebbe sentire della tua esperienza e come ti trovi.

I'm Buddhist and I don't believe in God. I grew up attending a white Catholic church because I went to Sunday school, but I also spent time in African churches.

African churches are SO stressful to me. Between all the expectations around respect, constantly being asked for money, the judgment if you don't want to be involved in certain things, and the constant pressure to participate in everything... I'm tiredddd.

I really don't want to go to church, but I still really want to have a Black community that I can cherish and feel connected to. Where do you find that as an adult?

There is so much about it that i have no idea where to start, videos to follow or how much i actually have to give out? Apps? Websites??

Now im not talking about giving my whole life savings away just want to inform myself but i need a guide. Also im from the EU but i see so many americans post about it.

Allora, per entrare in università dovevo aggiornare il mio certificato DSA. Alla visita ho chiesto al neurologo se potevo anche essere affiancata da qualcuno per fare un test per l'ADHD, visto che è una cosa che cerco di approfondire da parecchi anni perché credo di avere molti tratti e mi trovo veramente in difficoltà in ambiti sociali rispetto agli altri.

Il neurologo mi ha riso in faccia e mi ha chiesto se l'avessi sentito su TikTok, dicendo che ormai credono di averla tutti. Alla fine mi ha detto che me l'avrebbe fatto fare, ma durante tutto il percorso non mi ha fatto fare nessun test per l'ADHD.

Vabbè, alla fine, per il DSA, mi ha detto che non si aspettava risultati così bassi e che pensava fossi più "intelligente" e sembrava sorpreso che avevo vere difficoltà?

esperienza abbastanza strana

Girl Names

Mirabelle - Verily - Maria - Essence(a little on the crazier side😬) -Amaya - Melody - Ezra - Matilda - Rylie/Riley - Odette - Danielle - Ivy - Willow - Maya - Isabella - Nadia- Marina

Boy names

Emir - Idris - Genesis - Mailo - Marlow - William - Liam - Ryan - Adonis - Michael

I’ve been able to lose 10kg, but I feel like I look worse than before. I have such broad shoulders and skinny arms, so I look really odd in everything I wear.

No one warns you that when you loose weight your not an automatic hourglass lol. (Just jokes)

My face didn’t even get smaller, and I just can’t look at my face for too long without feeling bad. I try lash clusters but because i have small eyes i just look a mess.

At this point, I feel like I’d probably have to lose half my body weight just to look normal.

Ever since my friend has made more bad friends, she's been acting out, drinking, smoking, and all that. We are 18.

Anyhow, now she's in her hookup phase, and it just keeps getting worse. The first hookup she told me about was a guy who said he would give her money to have sex with him. He brought her to an area and then kept going after she told him to stop because he didnt know how to do shit. She told me the most disappointing part was that he didn't pay her the amount he promised!?

Now again, she's told me at least three stories about how she takes trains and travels hours away to hook up with these men, paying for all these trips herself. I keep telling her how dangerous this is because she's going to men she barely knows. Another recent one was that a guy removed his condom, and she just laughs everything off? . How many times have I advised herrrrrrrrr oh my goddddd.

And I know she doesn't listen to me because some of her friends encourage this behavior.

Now, again, she's going to spend the night at a guy's place who only texts her for sex while speaking to half the women on the globe. Same guy that also insists she drinks and she does it because she never declines alchool. He lives a 4 hour journey away!!!!

I'm so, so worried for her. I pray every day that she doesn't end up pregnant.

My mom depended on my absent dad for years, even though she threatened to divorce him 24/7. Mind you she tells me she hated him since the day they met??? She was a housewife while raising two kids and never got a driver's license or took courses to improve her job opportunities. Then my dad suddenly died, and we were broke.

Thankfully, after he died, she finally got her driver's license in her mid-40s. Even more thankfully, one of my brother's classmate's moms, who was well-off, paid for my mom to take a care worker course. It wasn't cheap at all.

Now my mom works in a care home and is doing okay, but she's in her late 40s and hasn't worked enough years to build anything toward retirement. We've lived in public housing for years because we still can't afford a house.

The thing that frustrates me is that she constantly talks about how, once I move abroad, I'll make a way for her and my brother and buy them a house so they can live with me.

I know this sounds disrespectful, but I genuinely don't understand how someone can spend 25 years in the EU and not establish anything for themselves. She spent years sending money back home, and whenever I ask why she never tried to become more independent, she just says she "never thought about it."

And no shade, but she was such a abusive mom growing up aways yelling, always expecting so much from me and i was dreaming of finally getting independance. Now she's saying things like, "We can't wait to depend on you."

Why me?

Why do people have kids without having a long-term plan for themselves? I absolutely intend on helping my mom but all these expectations on a kid you had no backup plan for.

My mom depended on my absent dad for years, even though she threatened to divorce him 24/7. Mind you she tells me she hated him since the day they met??? She was a housewife while raising two kids and never got a driver's license or took courses to improve her job opportunities. Then my dad suddenly died, and we were broke.

Thankfully, after he died, she finally got her driver's license in her mid-40s. Even more thankfully, one of my brother's classmate's moms, who was well-off, paid for my mom to take a care worker course. It wasn't cheap at all.

Now my mom works in a care home and is doing okay, but she's in her late 40s and hasn't worked enough years to build anything toward retirement. We've lived in public housing for years because we still can't afford a house.

The thing that frustrates me is that she constantly talks about how, once I move abroad, I'll make a way for her and my brother and buy them a house so they can live with me.

I know this sounds disrespectful, but I genuinely don't understand how someone can spend 25 years in the EU and not establish anything for themselves. She spent years sending money back home, and whenever I ask why she never tried to become more independent, she just says she "never thought about it."

And no shade, but she was such a abusive mom growing up aways yelling, always expecting so much from me and i was dreaming of finally getting independance. Now she's saying things like, "We can't wait to depend on you."

Why me?

Why do people have kids without having a long-term plan for themselves? I absolutely intend on helping my mom but all these expectations on a kid you had no backup plan for.

​In prima superiore mi era stata diagnosticata discalculia e disortografia (DSA). Avendo bisogno della certificazione aggiornata per l'università, ho rifatto i test di recente: dai risultati è emerso che ho una forte compromissione nell'area matematica/calcolo (calcolo a mente sotto al 5° percentile e difficoltà enormi con tabelline e divisioni) e una memoria di lavoro bassa (punteggio 72).

​

Per via di questa caduta nella memoria di lavoro, nella relazione finale i medici mi hanno catalogata come BES / Fragilità del profilo funzionale (scrivendo che non rientra nei criteri di un DSA primario "puro"). E se voglio usare la calcolatrice e avere piu tempo per fare il test serve un certificato DSA con meno di 3 anni.

​La mia domanda è: qualcuno con un profilo simile al mio o con dicitura BES/fragilità sulla relazione è riuscito a farsi approvare l'uso della calcolatrice per il test di ammissione delle professioni sanitarie?

Per me fare i calcoli senza calcolatrice viene molto difficile. Se avete esperienze con lo Sportello Inclusione/DSA o consigli su come muovermi, mi sareste davvero di grandissimo aiuto!

​In prima superiore mi era stata diagnosticata discalculia e disortografia (DSA). Avendo bisogno della certificazione aggiornata per l'università, ho rifatto i test di recente: dai risultati è emerso che ho una forte compromissione nell'area matematica/calcolo (calcolo a mente sotto al 5° percentile e difficoltà enormi con tabelline e divisioni) e una memoria di lavoro bassa (punteggio 72).

​

Per via di questa caduta nella memoria di lavoro, nella relazione finale i medici mi hanno catalogata come BES / Fragilità del profilo funzionale (scrivendo che non rientra nei criteri di un DSA primario "puro"). E se voglio usare la calcolatrice e avere piu tempo per fare il test serve un certificato DSA con meno di 3 anni.

​La mia domanda è: qualcuno con un profilo simile al mio o con dicitura BES/fragilità sulla relazione è riuscito a farsi approvare l'uso della calcolatrice per il test di ammissione delle professioni sanitarie? (Punto ad ostetricia)

Per me fare i calcoli senza calcolatrice viene molto difficile. Se avete esperienze con lo Sportello Inclusione/DSA o consigli su come muovermi, mi sareste davvero di grandissimo aiuto!

I'm so tired of eating the same stuff every single day. It's not that I hate African food but im starting to hate it because of how much we eat it.

Whenever I cook, I try new recipes and different meals. My mom always asks why we don't finish what she makes, but it's either jollof rice, rice and stew, or pasta.

No even variety of vegetables or fruits, fuck we need 50 apples for.

I don't know how she does it, but every time she acts like she's cooked something extraordinary. We have jollof on New Year's, Christmas, birthdays... and then every other goddamn day too. 😭 Can we please switch it up for once? Stopppp.

I brought out chicken last night because I wanted to make something really good with vegetables and bell peppers. I woke up this morning, and she used it for jollof rice. She was upset we didn't eat the big ass pot of stew she made last week.

I think what makes it even worse is that everyone loves it when I cook for them, but when it's my mom, she's always so hesitant to even try it. She'll take a few bites, end up clearing the whole plate, and then suddenly act like it's "too fatty" for her and won't eat any more. Then later she'll complain that there aren't any leftovers.