How do I attract the right men? I'm tired of being sexualized.
I (20F) have never really been truly desired in a romantic sense. Despite being a virgin (a detail which I keep relatively private), every man that has approached me is only interested in sex. I am not sure if its because of the media stereotypes about women who look like me, but I always feel sexualized no matter what I wear.
I've been told by a couple friends that I can be intimidating, so I try to always be friendly and keep a smile on my face, but I keep getting approached by guys don't care enough to get to know me after I clarify that I am not interested in hooking up.
I try to get to know the ones that I find at least a little attractive, but it usually ends up going nowhere; they usually seem annoyed or bored when I ask them questions about themselves. It's like they don't see me as a person.
Of course I'd love a guy to be physically attracted to me, but I'd also love for him to be attracted to my heart and mind. I have never had an actual boyfriend, so I just want to know what I'm doing wrong.
Am I being too pessimistic/picky?
(I don't usually post on here, so I apologize if this is the wrong community!)
EDIT: So this has been pretty controversial.... I should have worded this more gently. Also, yes, I have approached a few guys, but conversations can still get awkward when they realize I don't have an ulterior motive. It is a pretty small dating pool where I am from, so I apologize if my generalization offended anyone.