Something that's been helping me
My sweet dog died at the end of April, and it's been really tough on me. I still cry a lot and I feel very empty a lot of the time. I have my other pets to help me through it, thankfully, and I've developed a bit of obsession with plants.
Plants have helped me extraordinarily. I've always liked my houseplants, but lately I've been collecting more, and now I've made a big flower bed on my Sammy's gravesite. It's going to be really pretty, and they make me think of her in a way that doesn't hurt as bad as remembering her when she was suffering.
I have tons of houseplants now, they've taken over all of the windowsills and I intend to get more. I clean all of their leaves individually with coconut oil, I propogate and trim when need-be, I do frequent research on the ones I have, and on plenty of ones I don't. It's been keeping my mind occupied, it feels meditative, and the fact that I can care for something and watch it thrive is helpful for me mentally. I was so helpless and powerless when Sammy was diagnosed with cancer, she was too far along to even do surgery. I did as much as I could for her in her last weeks, and I try to think more about what I did do for her rather than what I couldn't. My plants give me a similar comfort, I suppose.
I just wanted to share this with this community. I don't have many people in my life to talk to about my Sammy, since most other people are over it, or they don't understand, or I feel too sad to speak it out loud. It helps me greatly to see other people's posts and empathy, and I hope maybe sharing this could help someone.