This isn't easy
TF contacted me when she wasn't doing very well. It was really hard for me not to offer her my arms and warmth of my body. There's never been a time when I haven't thought of her. The way she smiles, getting lost in her eyes, smelling her hair, and listening to her thoughts and views of the world. I feel eternally attached to her, and my heart was hers and only hers for so long. After years of losing hope for us, i finally decided to open up my heart and to my surprise I'm falling for someone. It's still so early but I feel excited again. It also has me feeling a little torn apart. So many times my tf didn't choose me and it didn't seem to matter even when others were interested because she still had my full heart, and now things have changed. I'll always love tf so very much, but now I'm giving my love to someone who really seems to also love me back and is choosing me. I'm still so sad that tf wouldn't choose me, but I understood she needed to go for the life she envisioned for herself and that I couldn't have given her that then. I worked on myself while she was exploring more suitable options. Bought a new car, paid my debts, and got myself setup to provide things I previously couldn't so that I wouldn't be passed over again. The timing was just off or maybe that's the way it needed to be. Idk.