Having a crazy anxiety about not being able to breastfeed
My due date is in about two weeks so I’m getting more anxious about meeting my baby. I guess it’s normal, but I’ve been having crazy moments of crying over the idea that I won’t be able to breastfeed. Physically I have something like flat or inverted nipples so I started wearing these nipple formers from medela. Once I take them off I see how my breast is formed but it lasts only like 15 mins and then it’s back to normal so I’m guessing there are no real long term effects of this practice :/ under the instructions of my midwife I also tried to express some colostrum but nothing is coming out, just some white specs which look more like butter than milk.
the thing is breastfeeding is super important to me for many reasons. My mom never breastfed me because it hurt her too much and from what I can gather I had a really tough baby time being sick all the time and super underweight. She also had breast cancer and I read that a big preventative factor is breastfeeding. So being able to breastfeed has tons of benefits for both me and my baby. Theres also the huge factor of being able to bond with your baby. So every time I think or hear the idea of me not breastfeeding I just fall apart. Ofcourse I don’t want to leave my baby starve but I don’t know how to overcome the emotional pain.