At an utter loss
We are trying… hard. But it seems like nothing we do is helping. Our now 6yo ADHD son has always been tough to parent. The tantrums started at 16mo old and have been progressively worse and worse. He goes from 0 to 100 out of nowhere over the most (what the rest of think) minor inconveniences. Tonight’s argument started over putting homework back in his book bag. Cue the crying, screaming, hitting/kicking me (mom), spitting, attempting to break things in the house and so on. He came at me and purposefully scratched me to the point of drawing blood. I have to admit the more he goes, I go as well. When he pushes me over the edge I have trouble remaining calm and I can’t walk away because of the potential for damage to his surroundings. We also have a 4yo who happened to be in the tub so my husband couldn’t even intervene tonight.
We have been trying meds since December. Guanfacine XR 1mg- minimal changes, up to Guanfacine XR 2mg worsening anger outbursts, back to 1mg and add Focalin. Increase Focalin dose/frequency with minimal changes. Switch to Astarys once he turned 6, zero changes. Now on the Guanfacine plus Vyvance up from 10mg to 20mg. This is working *slightly* better during the day but you can literally tell the second the meds leave his body. We have yet another appointment this week where I am going to ask for an increase in the Vyvance. Again, we are trying hard and I don’t know what else to do.
Has anyone had similar anger/severe aggression despite meds? Is there something I’m missing and should be asking for? We do OT once a week which is literally no help. He is so bright he knows already exactly what to tell her to get through the 30 mins. I tried looking into behavioral therapy but keep getting shot down without an ASD diagnosis. This is a strain on our marriage, our parenting of our other son and overall life. What more can we do?!