Suspecting I have ME/CFS. Life decisions are coming up, unsure of what to do
Hey everyone. I have a bit of a rough situation going on right now. If you have been stressing and agonising over some things yourself I suggest not reading this post as it may be potentially triggering.
I was diagnosed with POTS in 2023 which has gone into remission since 2025. I have suspected that I have CFS since 2024, however the symptoms have become more apparent to me this year as my POTS is giving me fewer problems (and therefore I can't really put the blame on it anymore). I'm trying to get answers right now but the neurologist I saw two weeks ago dismissed me and told me to go into treatment for depression. So I'm looking for a new doctor.
To keep things short, I just got an amazing job offer. Mind you, I've been unemployed and underemployed since 2021. The offer is pretty great, I loved the job, I trialled for it on monday.
However the trial work day on monday put me in a flare. I haven't really been able to think straight since, and I've also been more anxious than normal. The evening after work and the day after were especially rough and I'm still rather dizzy. It honestly freaked me out a bit.
I'm honestly sick of being poor and I'm also sick of not doing much with my life, but I guess I'm here to get some people to tell me that taking this job would be a terrible idea. I've genuinely been agonising over this for the past few days.
Rejecting the offer feels like accepting that I'm irreparably damaged somehow. And I guess I don't want to admit that to myself. But I do realize my body just gave me a warning signal that couldn't be more red.
Part of me is reasoning that it'll become less bad as I go, given I'm not used to working right now, but part of me knows that taking 4 days to recover from 1 day is not normal.
I also still struggle with wanting to get educated, and the job would offer me that opinion, as well as something meaningful to do. I got sick in 2021 and I still struggle to let go of who I was.
I'm kind of upset with myself for this. Over all of this. The rational and emotional parts of me are at war and I can't seem to make an informed decision with what I know at all.
It doesn't help that my partner and I are in a bad spot financially right now and my parents are urging me to move out.
So yeah, it's a hot mess.
I'm frustrated and pretty distraught.
TL;DR: Can't for the life of me make a decision right now on whether to take this job. I want to, but feel like I can't.