u/BraveIndependence771

So I have been in my relationship for thirty+ years and over the last 10 years it has progressively gotten worse. I deeply love my wife but I no longer feel safe having conversations with her. No matter what I say it will be wrong then turned around and weaponized against me. In order to validate what I try to say I have taken to recording all of our arguments but now I feel like I have to record the 24/7. I feel awful doing it and she is very aware that I am doing it. I have never shared any of the recordings and am starting to believe that I am wrong for doing it. Has anyone else felt like they had to do this and what do you do with it.