I want to end my life tonight
I want to kill myself after breakup
So I’m not ok, literally have been going through the motions with the guy I loved and all week he kept putting off our phone call to talk about things saying he had a lot going on at work and promised he would call the next day. So instead of me being patient and waiting, I told him the next day it was over bc I thought he must of had another woman who I suspected could possibly be my close friend but didn’t have concrete evidence. Anyways, it was stupid because he swore it wasn’t true and that he’s not that kind of guy and then he proceeds to tell me we should go separate ways and figure our own lives out because this isn’t working. I begged him to stay and not leave because truly I was being insecure due to how he was acting being busy. It’s no excuse but I haven’t heard from him since I begged, he ghosted my text and hasn’t called or text me in 3 days. I’m in such a dark place that I have blamed myself for everything and that my insecurities pushed him away! I don’t want to live anymore and I always feel like I’m the problem. He was everything to me and now hes gone. I feel destroyed, how do I move forward when all I do is blame myself? I can’t do this anymore. I want to die.