Considering divorce but I feel too indecisive to make a firm decision
28f ive been married for 9 months, it is still long distance. i thought I was being understanding and patient when I agreed that he could prepare the place we will live after the Nikkah. Fast forward, 7 months in I found out everything he ever told me in regards to his job/ finances was a lie. He has never had a career and currently does odd jobs here and there. for 7 months I believed he was saving and getting things together but for most of those months he spent unemployed. Meanwhile ive been at my parents house in my country working like a dog to make sure i had enough savings so that i didnt have to fully rely on him while I waited for a work visa once I moved to his country. It is such a slap in the face That I was always prioritising making things easier for him. I’ve been advised by Family to give him a few months and see if he can change and get things in order. I thought I married someone who was responsible who cared about me but instead I married a liar who’s never invested in their own future. Finances aside the fact that he managed to lie and cover up for 7 months plus abou the field he worked in and about him trying to save is what has devastated me. Not for one second did I think he was lying to me about a single thing. I’ve lost complete respect for him and in the last two months have realised we are so different and perhaps a should have never married. I don’t expect a man to be extremely wealthy but as I’d be the one moving countries and not able to work until I was permitted a work visa i did expect He would be able to atleast be financially stable to take care of us in the meantime. This is a conversation we had before getting married and he reassured me he would handle everything. Even in some conversations he told me I didn’t have to work if I didn’t want to… but I’ve worked since I was 17 and I told him I’d still continue working. But he doesn’t even take care of himself. Im scared of making the wrong decision by leaving but every fibre in my body is telling me I need to leave. the decision is so permanent it’s paralysing me from making any decision. We barely speak because I can’t bare to speak to someone who lied to such an extreme It makes me wonder what else is he covering up. I fear judgement on leaving a marriage and being scarred to not marry again. But I don’t deserve to be with someone like This. How do I know what the right decision is??