u/Calm-Artichoke-5351

my older brother (22) was taking me back from college and was visibly nervous and decided to open up to me by showing me a packet of white powder. i literally dissociated. i didnt know what to say, i was so shocked. in that moment he didnt look like the older brother i once knew.

i uncontrollably just started crying and told him i didnt want to lose him and that im disappointed in him (calmly because i thought that would hit deeper). he told me he hasnt been able to stop for 5 months and that he was stressed and all. he told me not to tell anyone and now its been 2 days and hes avoiding me.

im just in disbelief right now. like what went wrong? were a decent average family, no severe family issues. we live in a good neighborhood. my parents paid their blood sweat and tears for his medical university and love him unconditionally so why? what happened?

hes the only son in the family, the only man i can rely on after my dad and hes falling into drugs. im not stupid, i know drugs are addictive and even if he says hes trying to quit its extremely difficult. i just dont know what to do.

i cant tell my mom because shell literally have a heart attack. it was bad enough when she caught him vaping 2 years ago. now if i tell her he does drugs ill just ruin my mom because whats the point in telling her? theres nothing we can do about it. i cant change him, only he can, no matter what i say.

idk i just came on here to ask for advice from people with real experience with drugs because this is my first time dealing with something like this. never in my wildest dreams did i expect my smart straight As intelligent brother who i used to look up to fall into drugs. i cant even talk to him anytime bc sometimes he seems open to talk and shows signs of guilt and i think were getting somewhere then he js dismisses all my advice and were back to square one its draining bc i never know if hes truly taking what im saying seriously.

are there ways to help him quit im just so scared he will get even worse in the future.

for starters my mum used to say she believes in freedom of choice for whatever career path id take and ive told her multiple times that im interested in tech, my options were cyber secuirty or software engineering. but now my mum and dad are now saying that they wont ارضى علي if i dont go into medicine, saying cyber security and swe are risky and alot of ppl dont find jobs, i understand their point of view and i dont mind medicine but i feel like i dont enjoy memorising so much info i feel like in the future i wana have a side hussle like making money through projects and tech ai companies since id have free time instead of slaving away studying medicine. I have older siblings who are in medicine and it doesnt look easy at all but my siblings are smart and can handle so much memorisation, im not like them im more of a logical thinker, but again, l dont HATE medicine i just for some odd reason avoid it. my parents are pushy because they say its a waste if i dont go into medicine since im very fluent at english (ive lived in the uk for 10 years) but idk i just feel like my parents are tryna pressure me to go into medcine bc my older sister couldn't so now i have to be the rebound and pursue medicine now.. i know my parents are tryna pick the best for me and i know how competitive swe and im scared as a girl and in saudi i wont be good at networking and advertising for myself that is why im not confident in confronting my parents about me being serious about swe but idk i rly need help because everyone in my family is now bias and wont give me their honest opinion. shld i just go into medicine since it requires the same amount of effort as software engineering?