A guy SAed me says he was blacked out and doesn’t remember anything
I (24F) was assaulted sexually by (30M) few days ago. It was in a house gathering, everyone was drinking but what it seemed was nobody being unconscious. The guy came to my bedroom when I was about to sleep and began touching me inappropriately around my cheeks trying to kiss. As soon as I felt something uncomfortable, I kept asking him to leave the room and showed him I wasn’t comfortable with what he was trying to do. I even said to him that I will tell my people. But he didn’t care and even grabbed my private parts and took my hand to his. I never experienced that before and I became very scared and blank. As much as I knew he was doing me wrong, I couldn’t even yell at the moment as I got sudden burst of every emotions possible. There were people at the house that time downstairs but I couldn’t even yell, which I regret. It was too much to process and that was the very first time I experienced such things from someone I never even expected. He even made sure to shut the door and run away as soon as someone called him downstairs. But, now when I exposed of what he did, he says he doesn’t remember why he was in the room and what he did. He claims himself being “blacked out” to other people to who I talked about this incident. I’m feeling all of the emotions rn, I’m feeling vulnerable, weak and stupid for not yelling at the very moment. But the good thing I did was immediately tell one of my friends there that night. The more I think, I more I replay those visuals and what I felt, it’s been very difficult…
What I experienced will always be with me and it was very unfair very shocking and very hurtful. It’s killing me day by day. I haven’t reported it to the police. What hurts the most is him saying he doesn’t remember anything when he was conscious enough to shut the door and run downstairs when somebody called his name. I don’t even know how police will view this and if there will be justice as he defends himself saying he doesn’t remember anything!