How to handle a friendship that creates ethical-moral conflict?
My partner (28M) and I (30F) have been struggling with a friend over veganism.
Our group bonded pretty quickly over shared interests, but lately our friend has been a stronger advocate of veganism. For clarity, veganism for this friend means against animal abuse. They've tried lab-grown animal products. So, an ethical/moral vegan?
Initially, we thought this was solely about not bringing non-vegan food to their home, which we respected and stopped doing. We also had more care when planning to go out, which involves doing research on the restaurants to make sure they cater to vegans.
But it's starting to extend to all shared activities.
It makes me wonder what non-vegan people do in these situations?
We're thinking this might just mean not making any plans that involve food, but that eliminates about 99% of our hangouts, as we frequently meet together with other friends for weekend trips, restaurant dinners, and at-home hangouts.
I'm also just considering bringing it up in person, as I think it'd bring clarity to when to consider this friend for hangouts vs when not to even extend an invitation that might clash with their vegan choice.
To be fair, we've never been judged nor called out about our food choices, but:
- remarks have been made on how it'd mean a lot to "watch footage" or documentaries about the animal industry to realize the torture behind it.
- we've stated having conflicting dietary restrictions with vegan menus, but that doesn't seem to be important for our friend, it's mostly "that's a bummer" but will keep pushing a vegan option despite knowing it'd bring a lot of bodily discomfort.
- if special events are being planned, like a bday party, our friend will try to have a say on the location even if they're not the person the event is about.