u/Capable-Client-7678

I walked past you on a wide stretch of pavement. You told me that I was a dirty bastard trying to jump you from behind and you reasonably proposed that you'd cave my fucking skull in. Then you kept yelling after me for a while longer about how you were going to kill me.

I just wanted to come clean; you had me bang to rights.

I was 100% planning to jump you, at 10am on a weekday, right outside that new chocolatier that used to be Tesco Express, while pushing a two-year-old in a buggy. We're the real operators in these mean BS7 streets, my kid and me.