Love or Emotional Dependency? 26F LDR with 26M
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I (26F) have been in a long-distance relationship for 2 years with a guy (26M) who was my college frnd before moving abroad for masters. We barely knew each other back then, but became close later and I drunkenly confessed first.
Now I’m constantly confused if he’s actually the person I want to spend my life with. We’re from different religions, my family is pressuring me for marriage, and we’ve only met twice in 2 years. He’s still jobless, may take another year to finish studies + job hunt, and I honestly feel emotionally exhausted.
I feel like I’m always the “strong” one — motivating him, consoling him, listening to his worries, family chores, future stress etc. But when I need support, reassurance, or emotional security, I rarely feel understood. Whenever I bring up issues, he says I’m overthinking or just says sorry. Even when he improves something later, it doesn’t feel genuine because I had to explain it first.
Sometimes I wonder if he loves me or if I became emotional support because he’s lonely abroad. Even physically, he sometimes felt a bit selfish, which added to my doubts.
The worst part is: I genuinely think he loves me deeply, and I’m scared no one else will love me like this. But something always feels missing.
I’m tired of long distance, emotionally drained after calls, and constantly questioning whether this relationship is normal for a 2-year LDR or if I’m forcing something that isn’t right.
Has anyone felt this way in long-term LDRs? Did it get better or was this a sign to leave?