Husband has decided to leave our 12 year marriage. Doesn’t enjoy being part of it anymore and in his words prefers to be alone and is a loner. We have children. Life has been hard lately for various reasons work and personal. It’s completely sideswiped me. I think he’s having a midlife crisis and is burnt out but I can’t reach him. We have been together almost 2 decades. He doesn’t and hasn’t driven any of the emotional conversations and has constantly left me hanging and searching for answers. He shuts down when asked for more information on exactly what he means or explodes and I don’t know what to do from here. He wants to shut himself away in a room and watch videos. Half the time he doesn’t seem to want to be around the kids either. He doesn’t feel good or better about anything us or work. Very confused and at the start of a hard road I think. Both 38
I told him I wanted a divorce after this came out but he said the day after he doesn’t want that and doesn’t think we’ve give it enough time. I have been to look at houses and arranged for the family home to be valued when I was starting the divorce stuff. He’s now moved out. I feel I’ve had to push him into a plan for the separation. Just feeling quite lost and adrift. At times we’ve reconnected and conversations felt lighter with him taking an interest in my day again. I’ve felt lonely in my marriage for a while. He’s done things and showed signs of care. Buying me a coffee at our child’s sports event (I didn’t ask and he didn’t need to), buying me coffee pods for my machine buying stuff for the new house that matches our current stuff. Also making comments like “well we need a new one anyway”. So almost talking as if we will come back together. My heads a shed right now.