My (41f) boyfriend (41m) has been giving me the run around about marriage and I'm feeling torn. Do I move on without him?
I've been working very hard to give myself the life that I want. I work 50+ hours every week and I've been going to class at night to become a union electrician. I've been saving up to buy a house and I'm finally reaching my goals. I found a bunch of houses that I love and I'm ready to make the jump.
My boyfriend has been very supportive and is very sweet but I'm starting to get frustrated. We've been together for going on 5 years. Our dead bedroom started about 2.5 years ago when we moved in together and he really doesn't seem to want physical touch any more. We hug and have little pecks on the lips but that's really it.
He says he has trouble getting hard for sex but he has no problem jerking off. At this point we've discussed these things several times. Going to a doctor, seeing a therapist, etc. At this point I don't know what else to do. He doesn't ever check me out anymore and rarely gives compliments.
My timeline that I made very clear from the first week we started dating was that if it was going well I'd like a proposal within 3 years. We've had multiple talks about these things. But none of it seems to be coming to fruition. I'm honestly becoming incredibly resentful.
I'm at the point where it feels like the best thing is to start making offers on houses and jump on the one that feels right and move on without him. The thing is I'm kind of doing this behind his back and I feel like I'm being deceitful to him. I'm feeling torn about the break up but it feels inevitable.
Have you ever had this happen? What would you do in my shoes?