u/Cautious-Fun-2402

I'm living with my parents and I can't move out. I've been feeling so unbelievably overwhelmed lately. I just want out of the house I don't want to be in the house anymore. From the outside it's not bad it doesn't even look that bad but I can't stand it. The bathroom is moldy, there's a hole in the hallway floor, the carpet is so gross your feet turn black and sticky from walking on it, I think the water tank behind my bed is leaking. There's fleas, it smells like urine and every time I walk into a room the floor is wet with something random. I feel so stressed and like I can't even move in my own space without touching something gross. But it doesn't even look that bad if someone where to look at it. I'm currently going to a doctor, I'm working on an autism diagnosis and I have severe anxiety and I just feel like I'm never going to get out. Idk if I can hold down a job or make money in any way to get out I feel hopeless

I'm 17 and I've been doing horribly mentally for YEARS and I've been begging for help for years from teachers, parents, and friends and literally everyone has just blown me off. I thought reaching out for help was supposed to work. I just want to feel better. I told my mom I wanted a proper autism diagnosis and she kept telling me "schools almost over, you have good grades (which has never been true) why does it matter?" And I just don't know what to say to her. She's convinced I just don't have these problems that have been present my whole life. I had a breakdown and I started hitting myself and I wasn't able to talk and she called me insane and crazy and just yelled at me for like 30 minutes while I sat there unable to talk. She told me she's trying to get me help at the doctor's but it's been like a year of trying just to get to a primary care doctor with no luck. I feel so helpless I'm about to fail half of my classes my junior year and idk what to do. All I want is support and help so I can do better in school and just in life in general.