u/CautiousNectarine360

Does anyone know how to process energy after being ghosted? In my first relationship, years ago this was the first person that I loved and felt comfortable with and like it was safe for me to trust that they wouldn’t do anything to purposefully hurt me. They said they loved me pretty early on, the relationship moved fast but after a few months they ghosted me. I blamed myself for years, I talked to them again years later and they said it wasn’t my fault and that I didn’t do anything wrong, but they didn’t really apologize either. I think they should have paused on dating for awhile since I don’t think they were actually ready to be in a relationship again after their last one, and after the fact I wish I had just been friends with them instead since there was a lot that I liked about them otherwise.

I know it’s not helpful, but for years my mind kept on thinking over what happened. I think if they had just broken up with me I would have been sad in the moment but processed it sooner. I do feel somewhat sad still since I did like them. Not all of the time but everyone once in awhile I feel like I get caught back up in thinking of the loop of what else I could have done differently too, which is good to self reflect some but then it also turns into overthinking. Does anyone have any advice energy wise on how to not get stuck overthinking about this again

When I was in school, I was picked on one year by someone who sat in front of me, every day they would turn around and make fun of me, it was awful. I was somewhat religious at the time, I prayed really hard one night. Shortly after, this person changed and they wanted to be my friend and hang around me all the time.

I really thought the prayer had worked, but this person still wasn’t healthy and became really controlling and fairly abusive when we were friends, after being very nice to me for that period of time.

Anyways, that friendship really negatively affected multiple parts of my life. At the time I remember feeling like God had answered my prayer, and then later it felt more like a cruel, be careful what you wish for situation.

I know that it is coincidental, but it really did make me feel afraid or uncomfortable of praying to God, and I still don’t feel entirely comfortable doing so? Like I will pray to Mary or Jesus sometimes, and I do feel some connection with nature. Growing up my dad was fairly emotionally neglectful too, so I suppose it felt like the one time I tried asking God for something since I did not want this person to pick on me, it ended up backfiring.

Does anyone have any advice, or any ways to reconnect with spirituality etc?