u/Cautious_Appeal_6886

your partner).

this leads to the feeling that i should never date until i have my whole life together (fitness, school, discipline, money when it comes to it, ect) and i know that i will never ever truly feel that way.

i find this feeling in all aspects of my life (not just math homework lol), and im constantly thinking, "how can you expect this from someone, when you can't even do it yourself?" and "no guy will ever find you attractive or desirable bc you aren't xyz"

which i feel like ALSO contradicts with the fact that a partner should love you for you, and not try to change you. but then again, how am i supposed to expect someone else to love me when I can't do this, and would prefer a partner who can?

FOR EXAMPLE in case none of this is making sense. I'm not like super over weight, but i could probably loose some for health. im an ex athlete, so i do have fat but also tons of muscle which really makes me look like a fridge (or a body builder in a VERY committed bulk lol). i expect my future partner to be good fitness wise. in terms of cardiovascular health and also aesthetic. maybe thats shallow but i feel like im not alone at all for this. and i cannot expect ANYONE to like/be attracted me the way I am right now, because if I was a guy, i wouldn't find myself attractive either, bc i would want someone who was "good fitness wise". so one of my main motivations is so that i look good to other people. which comes with a multitude of problems im sure everyone here has dealt with at some point

so i was just curious if anybody had tips to help with this, and understanding that 1. everyone struggles and 2. every time you struggle you don't need to think about what some future theoretical man will think about it.

i hope this makes sense, im kind of ranting, but i really could use all the tips/tricks anybody has

thx!

i for one, hated biology. i don't like the just memorization you have to do, and I love chemistry because it is like a puzzle and everything has a place. I also for some reason, LOVE and am very good at the math that comes with chemistry, although my math skills in math class are not great. for reference I am in 10th grade taking honors chem, so I know I haven't seen it all, but I love it so far, and can't wait to take it 11th and 12th grade.

one of the things that makes chem class great, and this aligns with any class tbf, is my amazing teacher. she is super nice, kind of goes fast and is no nonsense, but is super understanding, and very willing to meet if you don't understand. even better, she has multiple ways to explain what she is teaching, which helps all students in the class because of our wide variety of learning preferences.

the greatest thing however, is the fact that before midterms, she gave us an assignment that included baking to help our nerves and have us relax. it did vaguely go with what we were learning about types of reactions (single/double replacement, stoichiometry equations, all that good stuff), but really it was just for fun. for the submission, we took a picture, and got extra credit if it included our family enjoying out baked goods.

this has been the greatest thing ever, because any time I want to bake, i just tell my mom that it is an assignment and have her take a picture that I never submit. it just lives in my camera roll. Am i baking as a way to procrastinate studying for my other classes? absolutely. which is why my mom would never say yes to me baking on a whim. but for a chem class? she is all in (and shes a double science major so even better.)

and that is why chemistry class is the greatest thing to ever happen to me. i'm about to make some apple cinnamon muffins in the name of science, and I hope that everyone who has ever done anything chem related, know how that chain of events has led to my teacher learning which has been passed down to me, and significantly improved my life.