Vent: SO apologizing to others for your behavior. Gentle Advice Requested
My husband was recently in the hospital and I was trying to manage sharing limited info with everyone on the notifications list. We recently joined a civic group and I shared with one person that he was in hospital. She, in turn, texted the whole group! I replied, “I wish you hadn’t done that,” and she asked why. I explained that I just don’t need everyone knowing his business when we don’t even know what all is going on right now.” Later, I apologized for snapping, and told her I just felt closer to her & her husband than the entire group, which is true. We literally just met the others three days prior. He was released last Friday.
Last night, I was working on a photo on his phone he needs to submit for a different organization and saw his text to her, ‘Hopefully, I wasn’t too pissy with her. I was just under a lot of stress.’
I’ve been furious since. I can’t get it out of my head. Not only feeling like she was wildly inappropriate all over again, but I handled the situation and even apologized when I didn’t need to. My responsibility really should’ve been to keep quiet to everyone! But him throwing me under the bus (angry woman trope) by calling me pissy to someone else is what’s got me gripped.
We’ve been together ten years, and I usually don’t snoop because we have an agreement to always talk to one another about stuff like this because of misinterpretation, but I know I’m going to look like an ass for snooping; at the same time, I don’t know how to let this go.
Gentle advice requested.
Edit: It was suggested that I clarify: He was apologizing to her for my behavior. He said he hoped I wasn’t too pissy.