[Complete] [71k] [Literary Fiction] The Coalescing
Hi, all.
I've got a narrator trapped inside another man's head who watches the world go by without being able to interact with anything or anyone. Then, one day, my protagonist, named Salmacis (Ovidian structure), seems to see the narrator inside him, hiding behind his eye. The narrator spends the rest of the book falling in love with her, genuinely but also harmfully, while fundamentally misunderstanding everything she does and says.
I'd appreciate getting a new perspective on how the beats land emotionally and whether the scenes ever feel too long or too quick. That sort of thing. Also, overall impressions, etc. wouldn't hurt.
As far as comp titles go, the work aims its conversation towards folks like Beckett, Bernhard, Lispector, Carson, Woolf, or more modernly Greenwald, Fosse, Cusk, to name a few.
Thanks!