Full disclosure: I’m 36 weeks pregnant and things are setting me off more than they probably should. But I feel like I’m in the right in this situation?
My husband, seven-year-old, and four-year-old are terrible at picking up after themselves. I’ll give the latter two a pass, but my husband‘s inability to identify messes around the house is driving me nuts. From time to time he’ll initiate cleaning, but mostly he’s a “tell me what to do and I’ll do it,” kind of guy. He has a demanding job that’s especially busy in the spring and summer. I guess I’m best described as a stay at home mom, but I also meaningfully contribute to the household income (40-50% of monthly household revenue) via equity trading in a personal taxable account. But due to my “work” being much more flexible, childcare and household responsibilities fall mostly to me.
I’m not a neat freak by any means, but too much clutter affects my mental state; especially during these hormonal days for me. I’m not able to constantly clean up messes due to a waning energy level and bowling ball in my stomach that makes it hard to bend over. Every time i’ve expressed my frustration about the state of the house to my husband, his solution is “let’s hire a cleaning lady.”
A cleaning lady is great for some things. Wonderful for the weekly or bimonthly stuff like mopping, vacuuming, toilets, windows. But what our household is caving under are the constant messes. Food on the kitchen floors after every meal, fruity pebbles that have stained the countertop because they weren’t cleaned up after breakfast, shoes splayed all over our entryway instead of neatly tucked under our hall tree, condiments left on the countertop after lunch is made and consumed, kids clothing left in the bathroom…I could go on forever. But every time I have a verbal and mental breakdown over the house, I’m met with the same solution from him: “let’s hire a cleaning lady”….DESPITE the fact that I’ve told him each time that a cleaning lady cannot come to our home three times a day to deal with clutter.
I’m really tempted to let it all just go to shit. Let two days go by where I don’t lift a finger.