u/Character_Light_5942

Im not vegetarian or vegan. I have no problem eating meat. I pretty much only eat chicken.

Im trying to eat healthier and was thinking to switch my main meals to grains/rice & beans with meat ( chicken broth mainly) as the flavor but not the main. For not only financial reasons, but health.

Things like rice, pinto & red beans, lentils, barley, cocucus ( I hate quinoa). And either add veggies to make a soup/stew or serve with steam veggies it the grains/ beans are not in liquid. Plus I occasional bake whole wheat bread. Add some cheese for topping & side of bread or tortilla. I plan to meal ppep & freeze everything.

Essentially no meat as a main. Ill use small bits of chicken or bacon for flavor. I just wonder if I will get bored of this quickly.

Has anyone changed their diet similar to this?

Spent enormous amount of time & energy on start-up and I fizzled.

I started my own (website based) plant-based skincare line (just 4 complimentary products). I spent hours, days, weeks, months of my life dedicated to getting it off the ground from idea to launch. Spend like $5K in costs.

I did everything myself ( formulation & product testing, writing business plan & pricing model, website, product photos, Canva social media ads -- everything). And I was so focused and excited every step of the way ( a few frustrations aside).

Then I launched 2 months ago & I didn't do too bad at all! 14 orders. I think thats excellent & Im really proud of all my hardwork. Didn't make much money compared to the $5K I spent though.

But I lost my passion and focus. I stopped social media posting and now haven't had any orders in 3 weeks. I kind of dont care about this whole thing anymore.

Im discovering I loved the idea & architecture stage -- but hate the customer acquisition & sales stage. The thought of constant ad materials & constant sm posting makes me ill. I don't want to be an influencer and I really dont care to be on sm anyway.

This was always supposed to be a fun side gig for me, it is never intended to be large scale. But like I said, I lost my passion for it & its just sitting there now. (I have an unrelated full-time job btw).

Probably burned out. I'll just leave it alone & see if my love is rekindled & go back to it if needed. I don't know what to do! I put so much work into it! I started just from the joy of creating and didn't care about $. Now that the creation is born, I lost interest.

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Here's the math for a used car I was gonna buy. There were 2 options available gas or hybrid. Other than that they were similar/comparable.

Here's the math:

The hybrid costs $5K more in purchase price than the all gas model. The hybrid offers 10mpg better than the gas model. Using gas cost at $4 per gallon, it would take over 100K miles to breakeven of the $5K price difference! And that doesn't even account for the extra interest youre paying on a 5 year loan!

So in this scenario the gas model is more economical.

Something to think about!

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Both are about $10K out of pocket, but I can only afford one option.

Option 1 (Practical): Upgrade Vehicle.

I currently drive an older compact sedan that is getting too small for my needs. It's cramped interior and is lacking good ground clearance ( its lower to ground). I prefer a small SUV for more space & higher ground clearance for rural dirt roads. I taxi around 2 adults over 65 3x per week, so they would appreciate a more comfortable ride.

So I could put $10K towards a small SUV. My current car is still predicted to last up to 5 more years, so the upgrade is for space/room not mechanical necessity.

Option 2 (2-week European vacation):

I could put the $10K toward this fun vacation so I have a great experience & memories. I love to travel ( when I can budget for it) & making lasting memories. I haven't done this type of vacation since before pandemic. I'm middle-aged so would like to enjoy my life before old age sets in. Not much foreseeable time left to travel comfortably ( maybe 10 years).

Of course I wish I could do both but can only choose 1 due to budget.

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I'm not rich but I have a decent income for 1 - a few hairs above US Median Household income, live alone, no dependants.

Have 3 pets to keep up after ( 2 cats, 1 dog).

I keep my house pretty clean and clean up after myself as I go ( I keep up with yard, dishes, trash & laundry). But I don't always have the time & energy to clean the 2 bathrooms or all the floors ( no carpet in home -- bare floors). I run the roomba robot vac everyday to keep up with pet hair though.

I hired a house cleaner today & it only took her 2 hours to finish. Its a 2/2 single-level house - 1000 SF (93 meters) She said my house was already very clean & just needed touch-up. Said she could come every week and clean for $40 a week! I had a cleaner coming once a month @$150 so $160 a month for a weekly clean is amazing!

I know I should be channeling most of my disposable income to get out of debt & build my savings, but I couldn't pass up this opportunity!

Would you do this or use the $160 for savings or debts? ( my mortgage is reasonable- its 25% of my take home pay & I owe $27K student loans at 4% interest & have$4K emergency fund).

I'm not rich but I have a decent income for 1 - a few hairs above US Median Household income, live alone, no dependants.

Have 3 pets to keep up after ( 2 cats, 1 dog).

I keep my house pretty clean and clean up after myself as I go ( I keep up with yard, dishes, trash & laundry). But I don't always have the time & energy to clean the 2 bathrooms or all the floors ( no carpet in home -- bare floors). I run the roomba robot vac everyday to keep up with pet hair though.

I hired a house cleaner today & it only took her 2 hours to finish. Its a 2/2 single-level house - 1000 SF (93 meters) She said my house was already very clean & just needed touch-up. Said she could come every week and clean for $40 a week! I had a cleaner coming once a month @$150 so $160 a month for a weekly clean is amazing!

I know I should be channeling most of my disposable income to get out of debt & build my savings, but I couldn't pass up this opportunity!

Would you do this or use the $160 for savings or debts? ( my mortgage is reasonable- its 25% of my take home pay & I owe $27K student loans at 4% interest).

I was hosting a lunch get together at my house- just lunch & quick card game.

It was 2 friends & the 3rd person was an aquiintance (friend of friend) that I did not know too well (guy).

So we're eating lunch and the aquiintance asks to use the bathroom. The other 3 of us were talking(still eating), waiting for him to come back so he could finish eating & we could start the card game.

He was in bathroom for the longest time! Im talking 15-20 minutes. I heard no stange sounds like throw up or farts & pooping, I don't recall hearing the toliet flush ( it certainly didn't flush when he left bathroom, but its possible it was flushed sometime when he was in there & I don't remember). There was no poop or fart smell when he exited bathroom.

Just in there quiet for 15 or so minutes, washed hands on way out. Then came out like everything was normal and finished his lunch and we played cards.

He just gives me weird vibes in general - he's just quiet/reserved.

But what the heck do you think he was doing in the bathroom? It creeps me out.

Background: Wife 50 (works full-time, owns home, still saving for retirement) Husband 65 ( retired). He doesn't have much materially (no assets) but gets a small social security check.

This is a new marriage (3rd for both), kids are grown, no grandkids.

Okay so what is the fairest way to divide duties?

I was thinking this way ( reverse traditional). Since each has separate incomes, keep separate bank accounts:

Wife: Brings home the bacon with full-time job. She pays all the household bills ( except food/household items & utilities, which I'll get to below). She is actively saving for her retirement and will start to think about retirement in 10 to 15 years. She also pays the 1 car payment ( his car is paid off). Any leftover funds are for her spending & savings.

Husband: Responsible for all domestic duties ( cooking, cleaning, yard work, maintaining house & cars, grocery shopping). Uses his social security check to cover all household food ( since he will be cooking), all household items ( like dishsoap, toliet paper, etc) and pays all household utilities ( only amounts to $350 monthly). The rest he can keep for personal spending or savings.

Does this feel balanced or unfair?

Tl;dr Can reverse traditional roles ( breadwinner vs domestic manager) work in a marriage with no dependants? Or is there a better way?

I am single by choice, so I will have to do this on my own. I have friends & family for emotional support.

My situation; I'm almost 50 & my only child is 28 & out of the house living her own life. Unfortunately, she doesn't want to have children, so I will never be a grandma.

I have a good career and am financially & emotionally stable. I work from home, have lots of PTO for errands and appointments, so that is a bonus.

I love kids and I volunteer as a 'big sister' for an organization, and so far I am mentoring 2 kids (siblings ages 7 & 11). We have an excellent relationship and I want to adopt them so bad but it's just a program a few hours a week, they already have families (but they are at risk families, their mom has severe depression & never leaves the house, never showers & lives like a hoarder- trash and filth everywhere - she will not accept help). But be sure I hope to continue to see them grow & be in their life as a trusted adult if possible.

All this to say, I am thinking about adopting 1-2 kids. Doesn't have to be babies but I prefer under 10 so there's still time to provide guidance & stability before chaotic teen years hit. I thought of fostering, but the temporary nature & traumatic experiences, I don't think I can handle.

I'm just wondering at my age & singleness status if it would be a good idea - because I know single motherhood is intense, probably especially at an advanced age. Plus, would I even be approved?

Thoughts?

I am single by choice, so I will have to do this on my own. I have friends & family for emotional support.

My situation; I'm almost 50 & my only child is 28 & out of the house living her own life. Unfortunately, she doesn't want to have children, so I will never be a grandma.

I have a good career and am financially & emotionally stable. I work from home, have lots of PTO for errands and appointments, so that is a bonus.

I love kids and I volunteer as a 'big sister' for an organization, and so far I am mentoring 2 kids (ages 7 & 11). We have an excellent relationship and I want to adopt them so bad but it's just a program a few hours a week, they already have families. But be sure I hope to continue to see them grow & be in their life as a trusted adult if possible.

All this to say, I am thinking about adopting 1-2 kids. Doesn't have to be babies but I prefer under 10 so there's still time to provide guidance & stability before chaotic teen years hit. I thought of fostering, but the temporary nature & traumatic experiences, I don't think I can handle.

I'm just wondering at my age & singleness status if it would be a good idea - because I know single motherhood is intense, probably especially at an advanced age. Plus, would I even be approved?

Thoughts?

I currently drive a sedan ( with a standard trunk). My trunk is basically full all the time because I have it prepped & ready to go in case of emergency ( roadside or general emergency).

I keep small tent, folding chairs, change of clothes, extra shoes, towel, blankets, jumper cables & tools, flashlights, emergency food & water, road side emergency kit, first aid kit - that type of thing.

I want to switch to a small SUV & sell the sedan. The biggest thing I'm worried about is how I would store my stuff since there is no enclosed truck - but an open cargo area. I feel like it's more exposed to the elements & to general peepers who might be scooping thing out.

What solutions are available?

I'm obese & middled aged. I just don't have the time or energy for high impact workouts like I did when younger. Plus I have joint pain now ( mainly knee & foot).

I enjoy long walks. But there is only about a 3-4 month window per year where I can safely do outdoor walks ( extreme weather the rest of time). Plus the biggest joy of outdoor walks is the fresh air, sunshine & scenery -- which obviously you don't get indoors.

So I got a treadmill for those poor weather days ( the majority of the year). No intentions of running or strenuous exercise on it. Just walking -about 3.5 mph for a hour, daily if possible or at least 4x a week.

But I'm wondering if something so low impact is even helpful to health at all?

I sell physical products. I want two different FLAT Rate shipping rates. 1. One for the small sample kit & one for everything else.

I went into backend & created the two options but the issue is it's a drop-down that lets customers choose. They are always going to choose the cheaper rate -- & I got an order in that did just that. So I lost money on shipping for that one.

I only have one product that should be lower rate ( the sample kit), everything else should be the same higher rate. How do I do this without letting customers choose rate -- Square space should be able to differentiate by product ( you would think).

I have very few friends, I just struggle with connections. I want to have good friendships but it seems to be very difficult most of the time

So my closest friend, I enjoy our conversations & spending time together. But there is one big thing that really bothers me & I don't know how to deal with it.

Everytime I express when something is wrong - issues at work, issues with finding friends, financial issues, health issues - all of it, she immediately tries to fix it. I'm just wanting a listening ear, comfort & moral support yet I get superficial 'advice'.

For example I explained my health struggles - struggles that I know very well & do everything I can to manage & live with, but know they will never go away. She's always like try this food or this supplement or this exersise or read this. I KNOW my condition in & out and I know my limitations and I know what works for me & doesn't AND I'm capable of doing my own research if needed. I just need comfort & emotional support not some half ass bs. It's like platitudes.

On the other hand, I know she cares about me & that's just her way to be 'supportive". But it makes me reluctant to share these types of things (my struggles) with her and that feels like I have to edit myself. It throws a wrench in things. Nobody is perfect we all have faults & quirks, but I'm just trying to cope with the hurt & annoyance that this causes.

When she shares her struggles I offer emotional support & not quick fixs. Because I know how it feels - it feels dismissive to me to try to tell me how to fix some thing that will never be fixed. It just has to be tolerated I guess. Perhaps I just need to focus on the better parts of our friendship & just accept I have to edit myself.

I sell physical products. I want two different FLAT Rate shipping rates. 1. One for the small sample kit & one for everything else.

I went into backend & created the two options but the issue is it's a drop-down that lets customers choose. They are always going to choose the cheaper rate -- & I got an order in that did just that. So I lost money on shipping for that one.

I only have one product that should be lower rate ( the sample kit), everything else should be the same higher rate. How do I do this without letting customers choose rate -- Square space should be able to differentiate by product ( you would think).

I have a very tight nit social circle - church. It's a bigger group but we see each other frequently.

When you're older, like me ( almost 50) you're kind of the odd one out because 99% of ppl are already married by this age, unless they are a widow or less-commonly a divorcee.

Anyway I've been single by choice for 20 years ( I was married & divorced 20 years ago). So men are not really on my radar, I don't notice them- they're just like every other person to me, I'm not desperate for their attention. I've only been a part of this congregation for a few years so I had to get to know everyone from scratch.

Long story short ( I was just explaining the backdrop) Im polite but don't notice men, I stay in the women's circles for friends. There is a 63 year old man who I always said hi to ( out of politeness- and I greet everyone, even married men) and it was a normal interaction, I thought. He never showed any unusual interest in me ( at least that I picked up on), so he was just another human to me.

Fast forward a year later and I suddenly notice he actively avoids me, doesn't acknowledge me, and always has a sour look on his face when I do encounter him. He also made it clear through the grapevine that he's looking for a wife ( I found out later). Dude is way too old for me as I don't find old sour men attractive anyway. But also we never had any significant interaction to get to know each other, so I'm oblivious.

I come to find out later through my friends that he was interested in me when I first moved there. So now, that better explains why he's sour because I never noticed he existed. It's not personal I just decentered men a long time ago. But he's acting a fool for some perceived slight that has nothing to do with him. It's like am I obligated to go beyond polite hellos? Can I just exist happily in my social circle without having to flatter a random man's ego and get ' punished 'for not caring that he exists? I mean I'm open to human friendship with any sex, but I shouldn't be obligated to treat him differently just because he's a single man.

And btw, he's still single & looking. Me, I'm single & not looking - per usual.

I started out with AC on 71 ( I leave it in 24/7 in the hot season). But to save some $ I recently changed it to 75.

That is the highest I will allow because while it's tolerable if it was any warmer I would be uncomfortable.

I read some do 78 & I could never -- I would be sweating & roasting.

I'm just thinking about setting up a home based business where I turn one of my spare bedrooms into a storage & production room for making & selling crafts online.

How will this affect my homeowners insurance in Texas? I currently have Farmers.

Not really talking about in person as that's easier to say no, not worth it.

But even expressing thoughts & feelings online I still find it difficult that it's discouraging.

I feel like I'm repeatedly misunderstood, intentions misjudged etc. Im starting to just not want to express myself at all because I'm tired of being misunderstood.

I feel kike whale 52 -- the whale who no other whales can hear.

I'm much older now ( nearing 50) so, yes my original beauty has declined but it was never important to me anyway. It has always been an afterthought, never part of my self-worth or ego. So while I see I'm clearly aging not only is it not a crisis. It's not even on my mind at all except occasionally when I look closer and say to myself, yep I'm getting older.

Growing up I was pretty - and was told this frequently. But it never registered to me that it meant anything important or had any social value. I mean when I was younger and heavily masking I copied a lot to fit in. But I didn't do it for vanity, I did it because I was playing a role. As soon as I got out of highschool I stopped wearing makeup & worrying about fashion. I enjoy being basic because the world is already overstimulating.

Fast forward to now, I couldn't look pretty if I tried because I didn't 'take care of myself ' because beauty was always optional for me not a high priority. But again that doesn't bother ME, but it bothers other people!

Now, I'm clean & hygienic & presentable but I don't wear makeup up or style my hair. I'm wash & go. I wake up, take a shower, blow dry & brush my hair & put on an spf moisturizer -- sometimes a tinted one. That's it! And yet, I am happy with myself and don't feel like I'm missing anything. I still get complimolments that I have perfect hair & that I'm 'brave' to not wear makeup. But now, I'm wondering if they're not really compliments but are digs? I'm wondering if that's a way to communicate in a round about way, that I'm breaking the rules?

But it's other people's attitudes about it that turn my stomach. The absolute vanity obsession, trend obsession, plastic surgery obsession, bbl & boob jobs. Like for what? Is there nothing more worthwhile in life? I can't understand it because I find a myriad of other things to focus my energy & attention on that are more interesting and rewarding.

All this to say I don't understand why it's such a high priority for a lot of people? Isn't it exhausting?