FINALLY official
Well it’s official, I am now actually divorced. I kind of like “divorcée” though- it has a certain French panache I rather enjoy. I really tried not to cry in my hearing today. I flexed my eyeballs so hard guys, but the tears still dribbled out, much to my embarrassment. I didn’t open my divorce wine either, I took my kids out for BBQ and they over shared with the wait staff and several people in the restroom that mommy is sad because she got divorced tonight 🫠
Also for a laugh, the cherry on top of my week was my visit to the dermatologist for a skin check. I didn’t wear underwear so it was an unwelcome surprise to be put in a paper gown, and then I sweated so aggressively from anxiety that it disintegrated, and I found out my skin is actually fine but I have a collection of bald spots on my head from stress that I failed to notice in the middle of the shit storm that is my life, so I’ve just been walking around looking like fucking Sméagol apparently for weeks to months and none of my friends have told me. So now I get to rub a steroid cream on it for 6 weeks and hope for the best. The dermatologist also helpfully and without a hint of sarcasm suggested I reduce my stress. Clearly that’s going well.
Suffice it to say, my entry into my divorcée era has been less glamorous than my vision.