u/Charming_Young6313

my entire life was lies and manipulation there was always some excuse reason crisis where she gradually took over my life and isolated me from everyone labeled me as the problem.. like she had to be my center of attention or I shouldnt exist.. I owe her after all. I ran away to military and created normal life healthy relationships but looking back anytime she was present in my life I always felt like someone was ripping rug out from under me and why did these horrible things keep happening to me bc I tried worked so hard to be healthy have healthy relationships but she slowly using my daughter manipulated her way back into my life and at 40 consumed destroyed it.. so when she gave me permission to kill myself bc her pretending to be helping me thru while trying to turn everyone against me telling everyone I was on drugs while dosing my drinks with sedatives trying to get everyone to agree with her hate toward me to validate her abuse aka tough love which also validates justifies dehumanizing me. does anyone else have an antisocial psychological evil mother.. even i have a hard time believing any mother could be this diabolical but todo this to ur own daughter im angry and still can’t wrap my mind around it bc all the hurt she’s caused was so petty to control be center of attention and all at my expense and she continues to believe their tough love is to help me which means all she’s given me is abuse hurt and claims doing anything positive or even being kind is enabling her awful kids. she’s only person who says or tries to get others to see me as awful bad incompetent.. a worthless burden and will say I should be grateful anyone tolerates me even if they are abusive to me.. like my ex cheated on me and she told me i wasnt good enough wife for him to do that. idk I want to get past anger but don’t know how