I have some type feelings for my bff but WELL IM AROACE
hi! I’ve been out as aroace since 2018 and my now bff has me feeling things. we’re so gay for each other 😭 I told her I had some kind of feelings for her but I’m personally confused about it and she told me let’s hang and see how we both feel about it In a few days, me being my overthinking self thinking I messed up I cried all night regretting I said anything. cause yes I’m aro but I do feel romantic feelings sometimes. very rarely kinda like demisexual but if that was in reverse for aro? yk? anyway I said I did have feelings but I think we’re both not in the position to be together cause of how our lives are especially our past with trauma. I feel like be both ain’t healed from our childhood trauma and I think itll rlly affect a relationship cause for me it definitely will ,chronically overthinking and such. I’m the type of person when I like someone and actually say it to them I INSTANTLY HAVE DREAD. like genuine“omg I wanna d*e “ it such a strong and serious feeling I have. make me feel like I’d never actually be with someone which hey no problem lmao but I do crave hugs and kisses and companionship . these feelings are something I don’t feel most of the time. I havent had butterflies in years and suddenly I did with her . I don’t wanna be in a romantic relationship with her I think? it’s liek I do and don’t? cause I think about my past and my whole life I’ve been someones favorite person . and I’m so used to that role Even if it drains and hurts me. I wanna be her favorite person forever. my ex bff was obsessed with me and wanted more. I never saw her like that. at ALL. I fear I’m becoming her . I love my bestie in anyway possible! And I don’t wanna do her like I was treated. I care about her to much to even wanna hurt her even if I don’t mean too. everything is okay we both agreed if were old and men are too trash for us when we’re old we will just have a old lesbian “roommate“ marriage 😂 I’m not the type to act romantic or sexual even in a joking way unless we close and sure I’ll joke. but with her it low-key don t feel like joking I just wanted to get this off my chest I’m aware some aros may not understand what I feel but I know everyone have a brain and if you have and opinion to say something do such ! trust me I can be more logical then emotional sometimes haha