Husband doesn't care for himself anymore and I find that unattractive and it's hard to just deal with it as we age.
Long story short my Husband(45M) and I 41F have been together for a long time since I was about 21. He's always been over weight a little and that didn't and still doesn't bother me as far as looks are concerned.
As we are aging I'm noticing more and more how little he cares for himself health wise. He never goes to the Dr. If I suggest he go and get something checked out he gets defensive and says to stop critiquing him and nit picking. However I'm worried he wont live a long life to see our two kids grow up. He over eats a lot, he has extremely poor posture. A forward slump similar to the POTUS of the US but worse and he refuses to even go to a specialist to see if there's even a little improvement he can make. Eventually he will end up like his Mom, who also has a posture like that and needs multiple surgeries as it's affecting her breathing, headaches and putting pressure on the nerves and spinal cord. He is also being very forgetful and his driving is really off. Like he will drive slower than the speed limit, and not go at a stop light/sign when it's his turn. I have to repeat myself multiple times even though I just told him something or did something in front of his face. He can't remember anything and at this point I feel everything is on me and I'm burnt out and feeling a lot of resentment. I'm sure if it was something medical we could take care of it and get him tested or treatment but he just expects me to deal with it. He's getting worse as we age and honestly I don't want to be with someone who doesn't care about their well being or how it's affecting others.
I still feel young and with it, and I feel like I'm married to someone in their 70's who can't process anything I say and does't communicate well. I feel very alone and just sad all the time about it. As I can't talk to him, knowing he will just forget or not listen to what I'm saying. I do love him, but I'm not sure what else I can really do. It's not my body and it's his choice to make the decisions and maybe he's fine with being the way he is. I just don't know what else I can really do at this point. We are going to try marriage counseling soon. But I know he'll feel attacked if anyone brings up anything he could change or try to work on.