u/Chemical_Ad_1461

6 months ago broke up from from ex partner ,to be honest we both jumped into the relationship after previously being married

we was together 3 year

looking back the whole relationship was built on intensity & not stability

the intensity masked a lot incompatibilities

6months ago I had to relocate and move slightly out of area ,ex partner completely shut down on me overnight -I put this down to previous trauma ,abandonment issues and avoidantant traits ….

I was willing to work through this and continue relationship,seeing each other 1-3 times week instead of living together

i was in limbo for a couple of months as she wasn’t sure if wanted to continue -I called off for my own mental health

we had a massive row at end as I called out her behavior at the end and we haven’t spoke for months and I don’t intend to reach out

now we have been over for sometime I’m still really struggling …

i dont miss her ,the space between us showed everything that was wrong in relationship -im just beating myself up for not noticing red flags earlier and how rude and disrespectful she was to me at the end

I’m just struggling to forgive myself for allowing relationship to continue for so long when I should have pulled plug earlier !

the daily rumination about it all is really affecying my day to day life -lol and I don’t want her back or miss her

help !

Just having a bad day today - 6 months on from breakup (4 year relationship )

No I don’t miss them ,neither do I want them back as the discard and complete disrespect was quite frankly shocking …..

We staying in sparodic contact after they wanted “space “ but after 3 months of this I pulled the plug as she was clearly not interested in getting back together and was a means of soft exit

From being together everyday and when not together we was calling /messaging each other to basically breadcrumbs overnight

Ended up with me really calling her out on her toxic behaviour and the way I was discarded as was way out of order & nothing a simple adult conversation could not have sorted

But was met distance ,silence & avoidance

Apologised for my words and behaviour but responded to with complete deflection on me

As said before do not miss them or want them back ,just an apology would be nice -but she will never reach out as her narrative now

Just hard to comprehend people who can compartmentalise stuff and sleep well at night

Well hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for me

We keep moving forward -just want her to reach out just so I can give a taste of their own medicine -silence !!!