u/Comfortable-Part5266

I feel like my base of physics is very strong, so I am fine on theory, I wanted to apply questions as much as possible, so I figured using eduniti's solution series was the best because it wouldn't take up much of my time so I can focus on my weak portion in maths and org chem and complete phy side by side by the date of BITSAT, however there's multiple phy solution series on his page, which one would be the most relevant in terms of BITSAT prep? Because I think by BITSAT I can only finish one of his solution series, I was thinking the 2021 series because it has deleted topics as well, and the physics was not too easy either, however I wanted to get a general consensus on it.

Like every day I give it my 100% even though my mocks and stuff aren't reflecting the scores they should at this point in my prep, I'm holding on to every hope and just putting in the work, BUT I'M NOT GETTING ANYTHING, I've done everything to a T. I finished my syllabus, applied like 50-100+ JEE PYQs for each chapter I found weak (esp Maths, I suck at Maths so hard it isn't even funny) followed reliable lectures, study plans, revision plans, BUT I'M NOT ABLE TO CROSS 200+, and every day BITS gets closer and closer, I just feel like I'm letting people down bit by bit, especially it being my drop year, I just don't know WHY, maybe maths is sucking up the time I'm taking for other subjects, maybe I'm being way too perfectionist in chem and phy, I DON'T KNOW, every mock analysis I do, I just see red marks all over and it pisses me off so much. I'm not saying that everything is bad, my scores are improving, but it's like 150-160/170 kinda jump (not exactly but you get my point), which isn't enough at all in the actual exam. Like I wish I had a pause button to just get my head in order, but seeing the date tick down day by day is just all the more discouraging. I don't know I just want to see myself in that university even if it takes the biggest lock in I've ever had in my life, but what use is that locking in when it doesn't pay off on the final day, I just get so scared thinking about it, and to add to that, I'm seeing posts of people scoring so much more better, while saying they got xx percentile in JEE, and I'VE GOT HIGHER PERCENTILE THAN THEM, again this isn't to demean these people in anyway I'm sure they're talented but what I'm trying to say is, what is it that is lacking in me that isn't lacking in him? I just don't understand, and I know for a fact when all is said and done and god forbid the score on the screen doesn't pass the cutoff, I will still blame myself for not doing enough, for not getting past and into that university, even though my eyes literally can't stay open if I sit still for too long just because of all the all nighters I've done, I've always heard it said that hard work pays off somehow, but I'm losing faith in that bit by bit, I WANT to be proven wrong, I want one of my mocks one day to just flash a 200/250+ score in my face but when, there's 13 days left now, and every day the possibility of it goes down and down. The worst part is, my parents aren't even the type to blame me or force me into getting a certain mark or percentile, so it just crushes me all the more to tell them the mock scores day by day, like I know they can't show it but just looking at their face I can tell that they wanted to hear the score start with two- and not one-, idk man, the only reason I'm posting here in the first place is because BITSAT has literally become my whole day/ life atp. I don't do anything else the entire day, other than maybe go to the gym. I don't know if people will see this or if things will change but I just couldn't hold it in my heart any longer.