AITAH for calling myself an ableist slur?
New account for this because I don't want my friends seeing this lol let me add some background
I F21 am disabled and have used a wheelchair for around seven years. I'll skip the details of my medical conditions because they aren't relevant to the story but yeah it sucks obviously
The friends this involves (ages 21-22) I met a couple months after I became fully dependent on my chair in late 2018 and have all been really chill with it, never left me out of plans because they thought I'd slow them down or saw me as different which is why I think this is such a big deal to them? Recently I've connected with a community of other disabled people and started attending monthly meets, making friends and beginning to accept that I am disabled and that it's okay to admit that I need more help than my peers that are the same age.
We often make jokes and call ourselves cripples which carried into when I'm hanging out with my friend group. I see no issue with it, it's a word that's been used to put me down in the past that I'm calling myself, none of them are disabled and I'm not loudly saying it around strangers but they started sharing glances until one of them (M21) told me to cut it out because it's offensive.
Good people of reddit am I in the wrong here? Especially other disabled people I'd like to hear your thoughts!