ETA: we are going back to get the cats everyone. Thank you. Sometimes when you’re pregnant and running on 2 hours of sleep things can really suck. Thanks!

To start off, I really feel like I am the world’s biggest jerk. For context, I am 11 weeks pregnant with my 4th baby, 2nd HG baby (for those who don’t know it is extreme nausea and vomiting that needs medication but medication hardly works). My kids have always been watched by their dads great aunt who gave us notice she was going to be retiring from us this month, so over the winter I started talking with my mom about her moving back to our state to help. She was on board. We haven’t seen each other more than 5 times in 10 years and have a very strained relationship but after losing the aunt that was basically my step in mom, I started feeling like I wanted to fix things.

We have 2 cats, 2 dogs, a gecko, and 3 kids in our house. We definitely need a bigger house ASAP but it wasn’t doable before needing my mom’s help so we are building an addition.

Previously a few years ago we talked about her coming up but I didn’t want her to bring her 2 cats and add to our chaos and she did not want to part with them which I understood but obviously ended talks of her moving in.

This last time, I agreed to try and make it work with the cats as long as she kept them in her addition and not in the main house.

Well, she arrived last night and due to the weather being rainy for almost a month (record rainfall for our state for the last 30 days), the addition is not done. Sooo she had to bring her cats in to the house yesterday.

One of them is (unbeknownst to me) and unfixed male. As you can imagine, I woke up at 2 am to the smell of cat spray wafting all the way to our second floor. I spent 3 hours trying to go back to sleep but just couldn’t because it was making me sick. I finally came down stairs and told her the whole house was reeking. She said she couldn’t smell it. I was in tears full blown panic attack. My fiance was so upset with me and angry and I hadn’t slept at all and I was nervous breakdown territory. She said she could find a shelter to bring them to.

We talked and I cried for a few hours after we got my kiddos off to school and I ended up telling her I thought it was best to bring them to a no kill shelter near us and utilize their foster program for people that might want their pets back some day in the future. She ended up taking them and I feel so horrible. I have spent 5 hours spraying and scrubbing and still smell it and I haven’t eaten, puking all day feel like crap both physically and emotionally. I just feel like I have worked so hard to have a nice home for my kids and myself and I do not want to ruin our home by smelling like cat urine and going to work and school smelling like that and idk.

Please someone tell me I am not the monster I feel like I am?

ETA: we are going back to get the cats everyone. Thank you. Sometimes when you’re pregnant and running on 2 hours of sleep things can really suck. Thanks!