23F completely lost after graduation - medicine abroad vs optometry vs job offers, need honest advice
I really need some outside perspective because I feel completely stuck.
I’m 23F and graduated last year with a Bachelor of Science from a good university, but the degree is honestly quite vague and hasn’t translated into any clear career path. Since graduating, reality has hit me hard. I’m currently working for my mom and I genuinely hate it. I feel miserable, directionless, and embarrassed that I’m still living at home with no financial independence.
I went to a career guidance counsellor and after all the personality and aptitude testing, he strongly suggested medicine. The problem is I couldn’t get into medicine in my own country, so the only realistic option is studying overseas. There’s a good chance I could get accepted into a program abroad, but it would mean leaving in a few months, moving halfway across the world, leaving my boyfriend, family, friends, and basically starting over alone.
What’s making me panic is the long-term reality of it all. I’d only graduate around 30, and because of licensing/registration issues there’s a real possibility I wouldn’t even be able to work back in my home country afterward. So I could potentially be committing myself to building an entire life somewhere else permanently. People are also stressing me out because I do want children and to settle down eventually, and they're saying it would be cruel to have kids when you dont have enough time for them.
Part of me feels excited by the idea because medicine feels meaningful and intellectually challenging in a way nothing else has. But another part of me wonders whether I’m romanticising it because I’m unhappy with my current life and desperate for direction.
I’ve also applied to study for optometry locally, as a 4 year degree. My dad is an optometrist, so it would be a much softer landing financially and professionally. I’d have support, stability, and a clearer future path. But I can’t tell whether I genuinely want it or whether it just feels “safe.”
At the same time, I’ve been applying for jobs and getting some offers, but a lot of them want multi-year commitments and I’m terrified of locking myself into something just because I’m scared and lost right now.
I think my biggest fear is that I’m making huge life decisions from a place of panic, insecurity, and wanting to escape my current situation rather than from actual certainty or purpose.
Did anyone else feel this lost in their early 20s? Has anyone made a massive move like this for medicine or another career and regretted it- or been glad they did? I genuinely don’t know whether I’m overthinking everything or whether these are legitimate warning signs.