u/Commercial-Table3293

Found a sub where folks post what their outbreaks look like and I was extremely shocked to see that quite a number of them have tiny little zits that look like ingrowns or something that looks like a minor razor burn or dry skin patch and fully reveal that is a genital herpes outbreak nontheless (diagnosed). If I was their partner I would easily miss the signs or write it off as a pimple or minor fabric/soap irritation from what I saw. Makes me question the people who freak out negatively on folks who disclose and are convinced they’ve never been exposed meanwhile the herpes outbreak is looking like a mosquito bite. I bet these folks in that sub are the ones who went the extra mile to investigate and found out the results, imagine how easy it is to bypass those minor scratches and bumps as folliculitis. Furthermore, I did an IGg blood test twice while having my first outbreak/lesions and they came out negative and only the swab confirmed positive hsv2. And even then I had two small popped ulcers that were virtually painless and not uncomfortable at all. Even the doctor said she would be surprised if it was herpes, I just went the extra mile to confirm. So how many people out there have it and don’t know, or write it off? In my past I can easily remember at least 5 people I’ve hooked up with who had active outbreaks and wrote it off as pimples or shaving cuts, now that I know the variety outbreaks come with. And of ALL the people I’ve been intimate with over the past 16 years, only 0.02% disclosed. When I think back, I can see that there were a number who knew they had it and still pushed for sex without condoms too. This has helped me feel like contracting it was not my deliberate fault. I got it from someone who had virtually no symptoms and used condoms. In reality, it’s a luck of the draw, anyone who is sexually active is at risk of exposure. Even those who react judgementally and wear being ‘clean’ as a badge of honor (formally me), can’t be expressly sure that they have never been exposed a number of times; have slept/or sleeping with people who have it and do not disclose; are in relationships with people who have it and don’t know; or they themselves may even have it and it’s latent and asymptomatic (no lesions whatsoever or very minor forms like in the pics of the sub) and are coming up with negative blood tests routinely and unknowingly spreading this. I used to be so paranoid and borderline fearful of people who had it until I joined the club. The medical field really really needs to revise how they test and discuss herpes and to stop delineating HSV1 as not an STI and 2 as an STI, seeing that many people have genital HSV1. Telling people they are fine if they have no symptoms and don’t need to investigate further or disclose. Even in the face of an active outbreak, I could’ve taken my two negative blood tests and ran but the truth was different. The miseducation and undereducation fuels an unreasonable stigma that leaves people ironically more exposed to the virus, doesn’t help people be more proactive with their sexual health and decisions, and allows overhanded judgement on those who have it. The herpes virus has evolved with humanity for centuries, long before any of us on this sub have been around or our ancestor’s ancestor’s ancestors. In brighter news, this year is going to be pivotal in the next step of suppressive treatments that can at least render the virus benign and like chickenpox, one outbreak and that’s it. I’m hopeful for the next few years and tracking closely for any clinical trials that need volunteers.