This is going to be a very very long post so please bear with me:
I recently had my bachelorette trip in las vegas with six other girls (three who are my bridesmaids and three who aren't). We had been brainstorming things to do in our group chat since Nov 2025 and finalized a more detailed itinerary about one month before the trip. We were there for two nights.
On Friday night, we had a dinner planned where we were all going to dress up; this was the only thing we had a dress code for. One girl (a non-bridesmaid but someone I consider a good close friend) didn’t follow the dress code. She wore a white denim jacket, blue cotton-like blouse underneath, and black linen jogger-ish pants. I was confused why she didn't dress up, but ignored it and gave her grace because she drove (not flew) from TX with her husband, 1 yr old baby, and 2 other guys, and thought that she was just tired. However, what bothered me was that she didn’t make any effort to talk to the other girls while seated at the table. I assumed it was because she was underdressed and she felt awkward about it and singled herself out, but I made small talk that brought her into the conversation to make her feel welcome. But that was literally all the talking she did that night. I thought it might be because she's an introvert (like me). However, most of the girls know of each other from growing up and social media, but I understand that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re close in real life and that's ok. That's part of the girls trip - branching out and getting to know other girls better. I really just could not believe how silent she was and how bored she seemed to be there. It felt like we were dragging her along with us. And before anyone comes at me and asks "well why didn't you ask if she was ok?" it was because it felt like doing so would have led to us accommodating her and the others she brought along, and I didn't want to risk that. So yes some might consider me selfish in that way but I also didn't want to ruin the good/chill vibes and mood for the remaining girls who spent time and money to be there to have fun. On top of that, I personally didn't think it was the time and place to bring it up since we only had 36 hours together before some of us would need to fly out.
On Saturday morning, we went to a brunch buffet. Her husband, baby, and two of their guy friends, who accompanied her during the drive from TX to Vegas were also there, but seated at a different table. And yes she did ask (on the day of) if she can have them join us for brunch. Low key I didn't want them to because my gut feeling that the others were crashing our girls trip was slowly becoming a reality. But we were already in the same city and I felt that if I said no, it would ruin the already short trip we had planned. She did let us know their hotel was near the buffet, but she never mentioned which hotel specifically when we asked where they were staying at (kind of odd because I wasn't sure why she was being secretive about it... it turns out they stayed at a much nicer hotel than us which made me question why she didn't just get plane tickets for herself but whatever, not my money). She also didn’t tell us the names of the 2 other guys in their van. After brunch, we then went to get coffee (because we wanted bougie coffee for the experience ok lol). She didn’t stand in line with us, and one of the other girls actually stepped out of line to stay with her so she wouldn’t be alone. I mean it's ok if she didn't want coffee, but like, when I'm at work and my coworker asks me to go get coffee with her and I'm not in the mood for it, I still go just to go along and chat along the way if that makes sense. She just didn't make an effort to speak and use her words. We then spent a couple of hours in the afternoon walking along the Strip, then went back to the hotel to rest before getting ready for a cirque du soleil show that evening. Some of us napped, some showered, and some of us sat around the table in the living room area of our suite just catching up. At one point, everyone was gathered except for her. I assumed she was asleep, but later found out she had woken up and just stayed in bed alone until it was time to leave for the show. That night, she wore white again, which I wasn’t aware of until my MOH pointed it out to me and until I saw the group photos. But low key I ignored it and wasn't that upset because we didn't have a dress code planned that night (although some have told me not to ignore it). After the show, we went to grab takeout to bring back to the hotel, eat in our pajamas, and have a cozy girls’ night. While we were waiting in line for food, she stepped outside and came back to tell us that her husband, along with the two guys, was going to drop off their baby to her so they could go watch a *Burlesque* show. None of us were aware of the baby handoff. We also thought she was just gonna come back in line with the baby. In fact, two other girls stepped outside to wait for her and sent messages in the group chat reminding her which floor we’re in and let her know they’re waiting for her and baby. Next thing we know she sends a message in the group chat saying she’s back at our hotel room with the baby… when we’re all still out. One of my bridesmaids is a mom and has a two-year old, and even she thought it was selfish to bring a baby in our suite without asking us (and while we're still out because wth?) or giving us a heads up what their agenda was. She never asked if the baby could stay with us overnight. In fact, she said that her husband would stop by our hotel to pick up their baby once their *Burlesque* show was done, but he never did. This caught all of us off guard. We knew ahead of time (3 weeks prior) that she would be driving from Texas with her husband, baby, and 2 guys, but we were all under the impression that she would be spending the weekend with us, not splitting time to take care of the baby, unless it was an emergency. And if at some point between planning and the actual trip she began to realize she wasn't comfortable with leaving the baby, I wish she had just told me and I would have understood and met up with her some other time after the wedding to eat out somewhere.
What we thought would be a fun takeout dinner and girls’ night in the room turned into us sitting down at a restaurant instead. Which sucks because for me personally, that was what I was looking forward to the most - us being girls and comfortably eating our hearts out while a movie plays in the background.
FYI, and really this is just a nuisance, not the worst part: She did 2 loads of laundry in our suite (which came with a small washer and dryer), one load each night. I don’t know whose clothes those were (I doubt it was hers because she was clearly underdressed for a short 36 hour trip even though we agreed on attire) because I didn’t get a good look but I suspect it belonged to the baby’s and the guys (I could be wrong but it was just a LOT of clothes). I mean it’s not wrong to use the suite amenities like the washer and dryer (I was thinking of using it too) but I felt like she hogged it. On top of all the other weird things that happened, she really came off as using my Bach trip for her family trip.
We all left the hotel on Sunday morning. Those who flew in left on Sunday too. But apparently her and the others who drove didn't leave until Monday because on Monday, she posted pictures of her and her family at a cafe and at the seven magic mountains (colorful rocks attraction place in vegas). So she could have waited until after the Bach trip for her family trip.
Lastly (if you're still reading this kudos to you), a trusted person I know asked the husband post-trip "were the girls ok with the baby staying with them that one night" and he (supposedly, because I wasn't there, but I do trust this person) said "I mean it's not like they were sucking dicks all night." I later found out he was asking other guys to join in on their drive, one of whom is one of my bridesmaid's husband, who stayed home to take care of their toddler lol.
So WIBTAH if I uninvited her and her husband from my wedding based on how they acted during my bachelorette trip?