r/AITAH

I’m 23 and he’s 22, we’ve been together for about 10 months. He has this friend who he’s known for about a year I understand that ultimatums aren’t the best and might seem controlling, but with all due respect I feel like I am in the right to ask. His friend texts him to go over and drink with girls, hook up with them as well I know because i finally had enough of my boyfriends weird stories that didn’t add up. I didn’t have enough time to see if he actually went to see them but I know he’s gone over to his house a few times. My bf cheated on me physically 2 days before my birthday and it was his friend feeding him ideas to cheat which i understand my bf is 100% in charge of his actions. We ended up rekindling and it’s been going fine however the texts with his friend is him still inviting my bf to things. I don’t feel comfortable with him hanging out with his friend and my bf has told me I’m over reacting. I do love him and obviously took a chance to get back together knowing he could do it again but I feel like if he’s really sorry he would cut off the friend that gives him opportunities and ideas to cheat knowing we’re together. Also to add context to those saying the friend isn’t the one to blame he invites him over to fuck girls. Also for those of you that are saying I’m blaming the friend I’m not I 100% blame my ex bf but I can still blame the friend partially for him encouraging my ex to cheat on me.

A bit of a strange one (or at least I think so). My girlfriends parents have 2 dogs who are relatively older now at 14 years old. The one dog just had her 3rd vet visit for the year and 2 of the three times my girlfriends parents just expected her to pay the bill (which she did). Now after the 3rd visit I paid without initially informing my girlfriend, once all was done and she said she was going to pay and I told her not to worry I had covered it to which she said thank you and so on.

Now we get beck to her parents house and my girlfriend explains what was done and that i had paid for it, instead of a thank you or anything else i got questioned why i paid and not my girlfriend (not that i did it for a thank you or for any form of recognition). After a bit of back and forth I explained i didn’t think it was fair she kept getting stuck with the bill when its not her dog and that they (her parents) are capable of paying for it but never do. Just to add this isn’t the only expense they have my girlfriend pay for.

Were both fairly young (both 24) so its not like my girlfriend has the money lying around to keep covering vet bills which is why i paid (i come from a somewhat comfortable family but i did pay with my own money)

So AITAH for telling my girlfriends parents it’s not fair that they keep sticking my girlfriend with vet bills when they’re capable of paying it them selves.

Hello, earlier today, I (25M)was having lunch with my coworkers, Fred(24M), Clara(40F) and Janet(25F) all fake names, we were just chilling, having normal conversation, when Janet had to go back to work when her lunch break was over. She mentioned how she was tired and that she didn't want to go back to work, in a joking way since everyone on my shift makes similar jokes.

Me, Fred, and Clara then pipe up and start encouraging her, telling her that she can do it, and that we believe in her. Here's where I might be in the wrong, after everyone said there peice, I though it would be funny to add, "Yeah Janet, even though Fred doesn't believe in you, me and Clara do" This is after the fact where she clearly heard Fred say the opposite. Though after saying it, Fred got defensive and said, "Hey, I never said that, I do believe in ya" to Janet, and then glared at me.

I only made that joke because I know Fred has a crush on Janet, and I was just trying to joke around and mess with him a bit. But I guess I shouldn't of said that because later that night, i got called into the office by my supervisor and was toldabout how they heard about the situation, and that Fred was upset with what I said, and was given a verbal warning to not do it again. Now im wondering if I did go to far and if I should apologize for what I thought was a harmless joke?

I started living with my sister 10 years ago and we’ve split rent for about 8 years (I was underage for 2 years). We always agreed I would pay the utilities (light and water) up until 4 months ago.

She also has 3 kids then moved her boyfriend with 2 kids in. She has paid the internet for 10 years, but I’ve paid for all our subscriptions since. (amazon, hbo, hulu, netflix, paramount, peacock)

I am moving out soon so I plan to take my furniture with me, but my family (brothers and mom) are advising that I change the passwords to all my subscriptions, considering that she will not be paying for my wifi anymore.

It feels like a dick move, considering I let family members that don’t live with us use them.

I also feel like if she has a boyfriend now he should take over anything I paid for previously.

I don’t want to cut my niblings off, but I feel like I should stop subsidizing her life when she has a boyfriend to help with that.

AITAH for cutting my sister off my streaming platforms now that I’ve moved out?

My boyfriend and I have been together for four years. He followed a coworker on Instagram and said he is going to have her continuously help him market/promote himself on social media, even though I had already offered to do exactly that for him and had actually given him the idea in the first place.

My issue isn’t that she’s a woman or that he has female coworkers. It’s that he chose to have her do something I had already offered to do for him, and then continued connecting with her through her personal Instagram.

I’m not saying he’s not allowed to interact with women, and I’m not saying this automatically means he has bad intentions or is cheating. I’m saying that given our history and the circumstances, I feel like it’s reasonable to want some consideration for how this affects me.

There’s also important history. He has a long history of looking at girls’ Instagram pages, following them, and liking their pictures in order to use the images sexually (told me this and has been a problem for a long time, but he insists it’s no longer an issue). I have forgiven him and moved forward, but because of that history, Instagram isn’t completely neutral in our relationship.

What also bothered me was that when I tried explaining why I was hurt, he dismissed it by saying things like “no one fucking cares about Instagram” and that all it is when he follows women on Instagram is “networking” (I feel like there is a big difference between networking via LinkedIn and following a woman’s account who posts bikini pics, etc.).

I was trying to explain that I felt deprioritized and not considered and I feel like it’s reasonable to expect your partner to think about how certain choices might affect you, especially when there is relevant history behind why something is sensitive.

Am I being unreasonable/insecure, or is this a reasonable thing to be hurt by?

My daughter is 1, and her dad and I don’t live together. I’m the one doing the day-to-day parenting. His mom loves my daughter and has a relationship with her, but I’ve had concerns about her judgment for a while.
There have been multiple situations where she’s let people I don’t know hold or interact with my daughter without asking me first. She’s also let her boyfriend kiss my daughter and put his dirty finger in her food, had a friend light a blunt around her, randomly taken her out of my arms, etc.
Recently, she gave my daughter to her cousin, a woman I had never met. This woman had my daughter on her hip for about 20 minutes before I was even introduced to her. Her teenage daughter was also interacting with my daughter, and I wasn’t introduced to either of them until after they had already been holding/playing with my child.
The cousin also had a 1-year-old son who was playing with my daughter. We later found out that the little boy had HFMD (Hand Foot and Mouth Disease), so my daughter had been exposed.
My issue isn’t that I don’t want people holding my daughter. If her grandmother had asked me, “Hey, this is my cousin, is it okay if she holds her?” I could’ve said yes or no. In this situation, I would’ve said no because I didn’t know her.
But nobody asked me.
I told her dad that these people are “random” to me and my daughter because I’ve never met them. I understand they’re his family and his mom knows them, but that doesn’t mean I know or trust them. If I had met them before and gotten comfortable with them, I wouldn’t have a problem.
He told me I need to chill because “she’s fine” and his mom wouldn’t give her to people she doesn’t trust. He also said I was being overbearing and acted like I was saying nobody could hold or interact with my daughter, which I never said.
I told him that if he were physically there, I’d trust his judgment because he’s her father and knows these people. He said that didn’t make sense because I was basically saying his mom has bad judgment.
I said, “You’re her dad. That’s the difference.”
I don’t even give my own family this kind of authority over my daughter, so this isn’t about me having something against his family.
The conversation got heated and I ended it because I felt like he wasn’t understanding what I was actually saying.

TL;DR: My daughter’s grandmother repeatedly lets people I’ve never met hold/interact with my daughter without asking me. Most recently, she handed my daughter to a cousin I’d never met, who had her for ~20 minutes before I was even introduced to her. The cousin’s 1-year-old son also played with my daughter, and we later found out he had HFMD. Her dad says I’m being overbearing because his mom trusts these people and “the baby is fine.” I’m saying I don’t care if his mom trusts them. I don’t know them, and I want to be asked before someone I’ve never met is given my child. AITAH?

I (28M) have a brother (40M), I only met the guy 2 years ago. Very long story, I'm not going to explain that right now. But me and him are naturally not close cause we never met until 2 years ago. We get along well enough but we definitely don't act like brothers. He is a bit of an arrogant guy to be honest, he thinks he is better than everybody else and he is just not the nicest guy.

My brother has 3 kids (17M, 15F and 14M). I've noticed that all 3 kids can not listen to any rules. They kind of just do what they want and there aren't many rules at my brothers house. All 3 kids don't try their best at school. They don't participate in any extracurricular activities. The family all eat dinner in separate rooms, I'm pretty sure the kids eat in their bedrooms and watch TV. But overall the kids are just really rude, they lack manners and they always to say something snarky. All the kids demand money from their parents all the time. My brother is scared of them, even if he will not admit it.

However, they aren't my kids, it's not my business how my brother parents. So I keep my mouth shut. My kids are 3 years old and 1 month old so they are much younger than my niece and nephews. Which is why I try not to comment on my brothers parenting, cause all he will say is "Wait till your kids are older."

Yesterday we were at a family dinner at my sisters house. My 3 year old daughter had a tantrum and hit me, I set a firm boundary and told her not to hit or otherwise she clearly needs a time out if she can't be kind. In the end, she went to time out for 3 minutes and then we spoke about what happened. She apologised, she gave me a hug, then we continued with our day. My brother walked over to me and told me that I am being way too soft as a parent. He said that it's necessary to raise my voice sometimes. I tried to shrug it off but he kept going on and on about how I'm going to raise kids who are disrespectful. Which is ironic considering his kids are extremely disrespectful.

After a few minutes of him ranting, I just casually told him that he is the last person I would take parenting advice from. He asked what I meant. So I told him that his own parenting is not exactly perfect, I mentioned a few incidents where his kids have been disrespectful to other family members for not reason, I said that he has no right to judge my parenting. My brother said "Oh so you think my parenting is awful." I straight up said yes. Then I walked away.

He hasn't spoken to me since, and honestly I don't want to speak to him either. But my sisters keep trying to get my brother and I to talk, they keep telling me to just apologise to my brother. No way, I don't regret what I said. He keeps acting like his family is perfect, I'm tired of his attitude. Now they think I'm being unreasonable and immature

AITAH?

So, some context. My mother remarried when I was 11, my step father Charles is and was a relatively nice man to me when growing up but nothing like with my brother. My brother (Luis) was born when I was fourteen and due to various changes at home and moving around by the time he was five I was in community college.

But here is where you start to see the lopsided relationship. Luis was already getting private tutors to learn shit like cursive and how to have a proper accent. Bullshit that Charles was paying for, while Luis did go to public school he was tutored three times a week after school and on weekends. For all sort of extra stuff that Charles cared about like that greek history from the new oddysey movie and other stuff like more algebra and stuff elementary kids don't actually do.

Its been a while now and Luis birthday was a few months back where his gift was a job. Charles made some calls and got him a job in a government office gig. It pays like 40k a year. Luis has a fully paid off car that Charles insisted he needed 20 hours of driving instructors to drive. And he was also given three credit cards that Charles started for him and are fully paid AND a freaking passport too. And turns out that he has been saving money for him since he was a baby and that there are 40k on a bank account for him. Luis does not have to leave home or anything and we are ALL supposed to be happy.

But its bullshit I never got any of that, I had to struggle with finding my first job at BK and then gamestop while going to college. And sure Charles did not kick me out or anything but he sure was not gifting me a car. I mean Luis does not have a super car or anything its a ten year odl mazda but whatever, I was never offered anything like that.

So this thanksgiving dinner I will simply pour my heart out about it, will they think I am an ass for it?

I (F30) have to get up around 5:45 am for work . I try to be in bed by 9-10 pm.My bf (M31)was building a PC.It way past 9pmtheb it wad 10 pm then 10 :30 I started getting upset because he had the light on and I could not sleep

.I get very overwhelmed if I dont start getting sleep and I can feel the hours ticking away.i Asked if he could be done soon .and he told me to just close my eyes when doesnt know what the big deal is while literally having the lights on.He told me if I was really tired why dont I just close my eyes and go to sleep then.mttered a bunch of words and finally turned off the lights while calling me asshole and some other not so nice words. I wouldnt care he build a pc of we didnt live in a bachelor so there is no bedroom to go to if he has the light on its literally on where we sleep.aita for asking if he was done soon I just wanted to get some sleep unlike him it takes me a long time to fall asleep to begin with I also get nightmares thru the night so I wake up quite a lot during the night making me already struggle to get fully rested he thinks I just dont try hard enough to sleep if I was truly tired I would close my eyes and be asleep already

i’m 18nb, closeted, friends with 19f, openly queer. i’ve always been jealous of her life. she has parents that love her unconditionally, she gets to be with her girlfriend in public without fear. meanwhile, i live in a religious and homophobic country with strict and homophobic parents. i’m a nonbinary lesbian and i will never get to express myself the way she does. that fills me with seething jealousy and envy. i never made her even think that im jealous. i was always a good friend for her. she never suspected it. our friendship is online. last week she told me about a funny encounter that happened between her dad and her girlfriend. i couldn’t take it anymore. i told her that i can’t be her friend anymore. that she’s a constant reminder of the life im never gonna get to have. how unfair it is that she gets to live her true identity as she wishes. she gets to cut her hair however she wants, she gets to dye her hair and express herself with it, meanwhile im stuck in a hijab. i’m trying to live in denial but she’s a constant reminder of the thing i try to avoid. am i selfish for ending the friendship over that? i told her everything in the nicest way possible. she was very understanding and wished me the best. our friendship lasted for about five months. i can’t help but feel like a horrible person for being filled with so much jealous and envy over someone i’m supposed to be friends with. aitah?

I accidentally broke one of my girlfriend’s curling irons yesterday after knocking it onto the floor. I apologized and immediately went online to replace it.

I googled the tymo brand’s official site, ordered her a new one, and also threw in a nicer gold Plus model. Then I showed her the order and she saw that I’d used a discount code.

She told me that using a discount made it seem like I wasn’t genuinely sorry and asked me to cancel the order and buy everything again at full price. Apparently paying the sale price was “cheap” and showed a lack of sincerity.

This honestly confused the hell out of me. She’s getting the exact same products. I’m replacing what I broke AND buying her an extra upgraded one. Why would deliberately paying more for the same thing make me more sincere?

We argued about it for a while and eventually I just canceled everything and reordered at full price.

Now I’m sitting here wondering if I’m actually missing something. Would you guys consider using a discount in this situation cheap or insincere?

edit: Thanks for all the replies. I haven’t been able to respond to a lot of the comments because I was busy writing a breakup text.

The whole thing got so ridiculous that I genuinely started second-guessing myself, so I really appreciate everyone who commented. I’m out of that mess now.

edit2：I canceled the order, but I did use the discount code to buy a new one. I decided I’m going to give it to my mom instead. I’m pretty sure she’ll love it.

My [30F] mom [50F] has decided to run for a statewide political office in our home state. She is entering very late, does not have the personal funds to support her own campaign, and does not have the experience (didn’t graduate high school, works a job completely unrelated to the role) to do the job. The current incumbent is very qualified and is basically guaranteed to win. She has never so little as volunteered for a campaign prior to doing this.

That might sound like my gripe with this situation, and while I do worry about those factors, that’s not really my issue. If you ask my mom about how she sees herself, she very openly admits she is very vain and likes attention (wild, but that’s her). She’s tried to start a “career” on TT to fill that desire but it’s not panning out. She’s posted many videos talking about how people will know her name. She’s always been like this. This decision to very last minute enter a race she’s wholly unqualified for is to service her ego, not to help people or because she is passionate about it. She’s never volunteered for anything and hasn’t been involved in politics at all except to rant on TT (incorrectly understanding governance every time). That’s also not my main issue, though I do side eye it.

My issue that has me raging beyond belief is that when I was in my early twenties, I worked my ass off in politics back home while finishing my masters degree in policy. At 22 I became comms director for a US senate campaign. At 23 I was the comms director for a state senate caucus. I worked up and down the state making a name for myself while getting my degree in public policy. Right out of grad school, I was hired to help start an organization to try and fix some issues in our state and took over as executive director, all at 23. We’re from a small state so the impact was big, and my name was pretty well known on both sides of the aisle. This is when my mom started (for the first time ever) to express an interest in politics. 100% she saw what she thought was an “easy” way to be known and recognized. She had never spoken about it before but it magically became her lifelong dream she had to do (my whole childhood her lifelong dream was to be a meteorologist, but of course getting pregnant with me at 18 is the one thing that held her back /s). I never really thought she’d actually do it, because to be frank, she’s done nothing at all to take the leap. She’s attended no meetings, volunteered on no campaigns, nothing. She didn’t even try to run for school board before running for a statewide office.

When she called to tell me, my heart sank. She walked right up to the candidate I had worked for and someone else I had worked with to beg them to help her run. They told her to try this. And while I know it sounds like ego on my part, they wouldn’t have offered it to any random crying lady but because they both know she’s my mom and I kicked ass… yeah. My mom constantly posts online about really inappropriate stuff or “clapping back” to random comments for her desire for notoriety. Anyone who knows her knows she’s a little off her rocker (with love!). So her blatantly riding my coattails of the work I did to boost her own ego feels really icky to me.

I want my mom to be happy. I’ve tried to steer her towards local offices as a start (again, she knows nothing about it and has no experience, doesn’t leave the house, hates people) so she can figure out what she really wants to be happy. But instead she waltzed right up to my old boss with a hand out. But she’s not me. We could not be more different. So her trying to utilize my work and my connections will only tarnish what I did (I may be the AH here but this is genuinely how I feel). Letting my very openly narcissistic, borderline mother try to achieve some pipe dream on the back of my accomplishments has me so angry with her. To me, what kind of mother would even think this is ok?

And I know for a fact that was her plan, to use all of my prior work and connections to do it because 1) she asked my former boss to get her started 2) asked me to send her my connections and every event she needs to be at and 3) when my one request was that she not mention my name AT ALL during the campaign (bc she’s nutty), she was immediately deflated and asked why not, in what ways she could, how can I help her then.

If my mom’s “lifelong dream” of 6 years didn’t come at the price of my hard work and reputation, I would gladly help. But I’m so put off by this for so many reasons, I don’t even want to speak to her. I can’t tell her (you can’t tell a narcissist you don’t agree with them) and I basically have to let it happen. But this has pushed me over the edge (I was already close to no contact many times for said narcissism and nuttiness).

WIBTAH if when this is over, and I’ve let her have her shot at her dream (to the detriment of my reputation and hard work), I sat her down and told her how I feel, even though I know it will go very badly? I just can’t keep tip toeing around her nonsense any longer. Piggybacking on your child’s work is beyond to me.

Edit: typos

We've been friends for about a year and a half. We became friend friends in the last few weeks of senior year but we still aren't close friends yk?

I'll admit I'm a very promiscuous person, I've slept with a some of my friends and many strangers, basically all my friends know this including her. I'll call her Carol since thats easier. Carol is well aware of my dating life, she'll joke about it sometimes and she's asked for the details about it before.

She also knows I'm bisexual, but I don't think she knew about my male preference before this.

Last night we were sending each other tiktoks and all that junk when she starts sending more couple-y videos. Idk what else to call them, but it was stuff like videos of two cats cuddling captioned "us?" and "your initial + your crushes initial." It was all so cheesy 😭 I didn't take it seriously so I just sent her that one drawing of uncle grampa after the creator learned the show was canceled.

She got really upset at that, started name calling me, just a whole lot of crap honestly. Carol then says some absolute bullshit about how "i have no right to reject her since I'm such a shallow man wh*re." Ngl that does piss me off so I tell her that I'm barely into women, let alone into her, and that she needs to get her tits out of a twist.

I shut off notifications from her and went to bed, and honestly I forgot about Carol until a different friend texted me asking about it all. I tell him about my side of things, and he tells me I fumbled the bag 💀 and if I was gonna say no I should've done it nicer.

Idc about the fumbling part but I was thinking maybe I could've handled it better or picked up on the bomb of a hint she was dropping ig

AITAH for rejecting my friend in a harsh way?

edit for added context:

1. this is how we joke, it's not uncommon for either of us to over exaggerate and joke about that kind of stuff (in reference to the pic I sent

2. there were no other hints before this, the random videos were the first time shes sent stuff like that to me. I wrongly assumed she was a part of a different inside joke with mutual friends who act lovey dovey towards me to purposefully get a reaction out of me. she clearly wasn't doing that bit

My28F sister 30F cheated on her bf 30M 2 years ago. I don’t know the details and my mom refused to tell me because she asked her to keep it a secret. My sister is working in another state which is 3hours away by flight. One day my sister called and was crying on the phone asking my mom to get a flight to her asap, when my mom came back after a week, she was having insomnia and headache every night, refused to tell me what happened and keep saying just give my sister some time. So I guessed that my sister cheated and my mom said yes, she broke down crying and said she’s been so stressed to keep this a secret alone, she had no support and no one to discuss this matter to. She haven’t told my dad by this point.

	My sister and her bf are working and living together. He did not found out that she cheated, she confessed to him. He becomes depressed and had multiple suicide attempts so my sister wanted to wait for him to heal/recover. They decided to move on together as a couple, spent a lot of money on private couple counselling, trying to be as open to each other as possible including him having all the access to her phone and WhatsApp messages (she had deactivated and deleted all her social media after the incident) and things are not going well, he will brings up the cheating every now and then which makes her uncomfortable. 

When my mom was there, she advised my sister that she should consider breaking up if he keeps on bringing the cheating up. It is not healthy for the relationship if he still hold grudges and keep reminding her that she did him wrong everyday. It was 100% her fault that the relationship ended up this way but she has to let him go. My sister agreed at first, promised my mom that she will reconsider in a year. My mom also apologised to her bf saying that she will support his decision.

My mom wants to call my sister in private every week for life updates, since her bf has all the access to all her WhatsApp messages. She did that for 2 weeks and slowly cutting us off. Every time we asked if she is free to talk, she kept giving excuses that she is working or exercising, would not reply any messages and emails. Since we lived so far away from her, we have no idea how is she doing. My parents were so worried, they decided to fly over and meet her up. Even when my parents were right in front of her, she was still reluctant to talk. They had a big fight that night. 

From what my mom told me, my sister blamed basically everything on my parents;

1. My dad “forced” her to be a doctor
   It is her wish to be a doctor ever since i have memories, she was highly motivated in school, she had very good grades, she joined first aid team as her extracurricular activity and became a president for the club. She always wanted to be a doctor. My family was not rich, my dad is bankrupt and my mom was blacklisted for being my dad’s guarantor. We used to struggle financially. She thought of getting scholarships to be a nurse in Singapore instead. But my dad refinanced another house so that we can get student loan without interest for her to study medicine.

2. She doesn’t know how to love someone because she didn’t learn that from my parents
   That was the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard. My parents are not physically affectionate or say “i love you” all the time, they are the typical middle age chinese couple. They have some banters sometimes but never actually fought and argued in front of us. How do you blame your own cheating using this reason?

3. She was not as well taken care of as a kid compared to how her bf taking care of her
   She used to have seasonal allergies where she sneezes a lot, not everyday but once every few months, she blamed my mom for this, how embarrassed for her to keep on rubbing her nose all the time etc. Her bf bought her air purifier machine and allergy medicine. I think you can’t compare that with what we had 20 years ago, our room is the only room with air conditioner in the whole house, information are not easily available, we also drove 8 hours to another town which cure her lip allergies. Her bf is single with doctor salary and knowledge.

   4. My parents are not considerate of her bf’s feeling and forcing her to make a decision
      Again, my mom can’t get in touch with her because she has been refusing to pick up the phone for months. Every time we asked, she said she’s busy, my mom has not bring up the break up ever since her first last minute flight to meet her.

   5. She has no money as she spent it all on couple therapy, she wants to buy a car
      When she first confessed to my mom, she said she wants to buy a car, in case if they really break up, she could still drive to work. My mom said okay, let me know what type of car you want, we can pay for the down payment etc. Fast forward to the fight, my parents asked her, hey have you decided what car do you want and how much do you need for the down payment, she scolded them saying she has no money.

My parents were absolutely heart broken. My father cried for the first time in front of my mother. They withdraw 40k from their pension funds (which is the amount of student loan she paid for the past 5 years since she started working) and gave her back all her long term high interest savings since young, about 30k. They will take over her student loan and she doesn’t need to pay anything. When the money was transferred, she did not said anything to my parents, no thanks, no i got the money, nothing. She totally cut us off from her life and pretends we never existed.

When it was her birthday, my mom texted her happy birthday and wished her happiness. Here’s what she replied : “thank you, it’s okay, happiness is not something I deserve, i will keep on trying my best to be a better self”

It’s been 2 years since this happened and the situation has not improved, she asked us to give her time and space, and we did. She wouldn’t even reply my call when i texted her saying its urgent, when my youngest uncle passed away unexpectedly in May. The funeral was on a Tuesday but you can start paying last respect over the weekends, she refused to come, saying that she is busy. The funeral service is only 1 hour away from her place. When she did came when everything was over, she started crying and said my parents were not respecting her bf and her bf is suffering too. We were absolutely dumbfounded because we never even mentioned his name?!

So AITA if i go no contact with her?

I (23F) have a younger sister(almost 20) and a much older half-sister (34). Our mom passed away very unexpectedly a few years ago, so anything involving our family, inheritance, and our childhood home is obviously complicated by grief.

For some context, my sister had a very different childhood than my younger sister and I. We come from an immigrant family, and our mom came to the US when my sister was young to establish herself financially while my sister stayed in their home country. Due to circumstances outside of our mom's control, it took much longer than expected to bring her here. During that time, my sister was told a different story about why our mom left and understandably has a lot of childhood trauma and resentment surrounding it.

When our mom died, she left my sister and me some money she'd been saving for our education and a few investments. My older sister, who was already older, married, and established, was left other family assets/property instead. Our dad is technically her stepfather, but he has been her dad for most of her life. Her biological father isn't involved, and my dad has always treated her as his daughter.

Since my moms passing, my sister has made several comments about how our dad needs to make sure his will divides everything equally between the three of us. This already rubs me the wrong way because he's our only living parent and I hate talking about what we're "getting" when he dies.

The biggest disagreement is our childhood home. Our dad still owns it, and while it's becoming expensive for him to maintain alone, he has repeatedly said he'd love for the house to stay in the family and potentially go to one of his kids someday.

My sister keeps insisting he should sell it, saying "none of us want it" despite never asking my sister or me, and has also said it would be unfair if one of us ended up with it.

This is where I lose patience. It's our dad's house. If he wants to sell it, fine. If he wants to keep it, fine. And if he wants one of his children to eventually have it, I think that's his decision too. Obviously the financial details would need to be worked out fairly, but I don't think my sister gets to declare that keeping the home in the family is off the table because of her own issue with it.

I finally basically told her to F off and stop talking about our living parent's assets like they're already ours to divide or as if the assets are more important than our only living parent.

I know she has legitimate trauma and complicated feelings surrounding our mom, and I also know my attachment to the house is tied to my own grief. But I can't help feeling like some of her fixation on everything being "equal" is coming from resentment, and she's trying to control a decision that isn't hers.

She thinks I'm being emotional and unrealistic. I think she's being selfish and insensitive to the situation and honestly just rude.

AITAH?

This is a stupid post.

A year ago, my mom bought a new Apple Watch to replace her old one. My Father then gave me the old one to keep.

I don’t want it. It won’t let me sync my Apple ID to it, plus I don’t like wearing watches anyways. I’ve never worn one in my life. Everytime I wear something on my wrist I end up getting blisters on my wrist and they end up discolored and red.

I told my mom I didn’t want it anymore and she said I should be grateful that it was given to me, and that I only wore it for one day, so how can I knock something I haven’t fully tried?

It’s just been sitting in my room. Un-touched. I wanted to give it to somebody else or trade it in. I feel bad that it’s just sitting there untouched.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful it was given to me, but the thing is.. I’m never going to use it. I don’t like wearing watches. I’d rather have it not sit and collect dust, and give it to somebody who’ll actually use it.

AITAH??

Hey everyone,

Honestly I’ve felt like I should’ve done a post like these a long time ago but I guess now’s my time lol.

My girlfriend and I have been together for a long time now and have finally made it to a place where it feels right again. Our problems have been created by myself and I understand that. A big part of that was an old friend of mine that I had refused to let go because she asked me to. I have since stopped talking to this friend due to not wanting to lose my relationship.

Him and I would talk about other girls, our relationship and anything else really. Obviously when my gf had seen these conversations she wasn’t happy and looking back yes I understand. I fought to keep him in my life for a while and it always created animosity and finally I made that choice to not speak to him anymore.

And that brings us to today, when she went on a random lurk (as most people do) and sent me a photo of him to talk shit. I allowed her to and kind of agreed with the comments that were made but I didn’t actively “join” in. She got angry at me saying it was embarrassing that I didn’t join in and that between us should be a “safe space”. Also I’m being accused of still talking to him even though I haven’t for months at this point. I’ve tried telling her that I haven’t spoken to him and that it is a safe space with me it’s just that I don’t want to talk about him. In my head just because we have stopped being friends it wasn’t because he did something to me personally and I have a hard time thinking ill of him because I did consider him as a close friend to me. I really just don’t understand as to why I’m getting heat being told I’m “riding him” and “defending him”. I feel like there’s a lot more that I could add just don’t have the character space or time to do all of that right now lol but I would hope to get some valuable opinions from anyone that cares to read. So I ask, am I the asshole?

AITAH for not going to my friends son's birthday party.

I am 21 f and my friend is 33 f. We met when I was 18 and babysat for her kid (5 m) We will call her Lexi and her son Sunny. Lexi and I have been inseparable since we met and have spent lots of time together. She referred to me as her sister and called me sunnys aunt. We had frequent sleepovers before I got my new demanding job (12 hour shifts). I even had things that I left at her home.

This is relevant information.started dating my boyfriend (27m) about 4 months ago. I've been dividing my time between my friends and him equally and have had to find more time because of his class schedule.

This leads me to a couple weekends ago. The day before the party i came over to Lexis house to help her set up and get things prepared for sunnys party. We talked about my boyfriend (which she dismissed and interrupted) and she brought up her declining health. I asked questions and told her I hope she feels better soon.

I also asked when sunnys party was because I had forgotten. I have adhd and am working on using a calender to start tracking important events, appointments, and plans, but sometimes forget.

She told me his actual birthday and when the party was. When I had said he has the same birthday as my boyfriend she got mad and said it was bad that I remembered someone's birthday I had just met over sunnys. I reminded her that I remembered a few celebrities birthdays before I memorized my parents. Dates are something that I struggle with. (We lost my dog to illness 4 months ago and some days I forget the date she passed which is a very important and traumatic date for me.)

She then told me sunnys party was the next weekend. I forgot and had made plans to spend the day with my boyfriend the same day as with my demanding work schedule and his classes we hadn't seen each other in a week and that would be the only day that would work.

I then asked what time the party was. She told me it was 2pm. I offered to come help set up, drop off a gift, and stay for an hour or two and then head out. I tried to find a happy medium. Even if I wasn't seeing my boyfriend I wasn't planning on spending 4 plus hours at a children's party regardless.

Also relevent information. Anytime id mention anything about my boyfriend, she would ignore it. Before he asked me to be his girlfriend she was supportive. The minute I became his girlfriend, she found any reason to talk poorly about him. I know he is not a bad person as my parents and other friends tell me he is a great guy (along with my therapist) and are all very happy for me.

She would constantly tell me that because of out age gap he will not respect me and that there is something wrong with someone his age dating someone who is 21. My boyfriend and I are both going through similar stages of life and are both child free.

She also got jealous when I was 20 and made a new friend (f 17), lets call her alice, going as far as telling me that I was replacing her. She put doubts in my head about my friendship with Alice. This ruined my friendship with Alice and lead to an argument that lexi started and insulted her many times as well as repeatedly calling Alice's phone.

Back to the plot.

A few days later lexi texted me saying that her husband wouldn't be home until later so they wouldn't be setting up until the afternoon. I asked what time and gor no response. My message was left on open.

A few days passed and I got a message from her husband stating that lexi was deeply hurt that i was putting "some guy" over sunny who considered me his aunt. He stated that its best that i stay away until lexi can heal.

I did not go to the party and ended up going to my boyfriends house at 11am that day to stay the night and go to an out of state concert the next day.

A few days later I was met with a long message about how I was immature and she did not want to be friends anymore. That i didn't deserve to have sunny call me his aunt. She ended it with using things I told her about my life in confidence (something I was deeply embarrassed about and struggled with) and told me to stay away from her family.

Her husband contacted me to collect my things and when I received them there was a long page full of size 9 or 10 times new roman font. Most of the letter just called me a sl\\\^t, insecure, amd immature.

Am I the a hole for not going?

We’ve been together six years and have a family. The video is from 7 years before we met and is a graphic video of my now wife having sex with an ex boyfriend. This particular person reached out to her in the past year, and she said that could be because she was the only person he ever loved (that comment made me uncomfortable at the time; it is ringing in my ears now). That relationship purportedly ended because he wouldn’t commit (not her decision).

Interestingly, I didn’t try to get into her photos; she logged into her Google account on my phone a few months ago and apparently never logged out. I have an iPhone. I stumbled upon the fact that her photos were showing up in a web browser version of Google Photos after she sent me a photo the other day, I’m guessing from that app.

We have an agreement to respect each other’s privacy and AFAIK have never tried to get into each other’s phones. I trust her fully and she trusts me. I do not suspect infidelity of any kind. But I admit I screwed up looking through her photos given our agreement. I knew I shouldn’t have but my curiosity got the better of me.

She’s told me that she’s never sent nudes and has never recorded a video (I’ve asked casually in the past and this is the reason she declined). But both of those things showed up in her photos, which just left me feeling sad. Still, at the end of the day it should have been her prerogative to disclose them or not because we agreed to respect each other’s privacy.

Now she’s saying she doesn’t know if she can forgive this breach of trust. I’ve apologized and feel bad for looking through her photos, but I also wonder if I don’t deserve forgiveness and whether she could be sensitive to how in might have felt watching that. She hasn’t asked once how it made me feel (like throwing up).

I am allowed access to my bf's phone, he left it open to a text convo between his and their kid's mother, they are basically raising their granddaughter... there has been issues between me, bm, and him because of his alcoholism. Recently, after several months of them going back and forth about him being drunk, and being cut off from granddaughter, me standing my ground, BM told my bf, "I can rent a cabin, me and you (bf) should go for a couple nights," with no mention of her husband or myself going to join them. I'm not bringing it up, but it's driving me insane when she calls him 20x a day... WIBTA, if I bought it up??