Stuck in a constant cycle of 4 different dopamine sources.
18F I was just recently diagnosed with ADHD and prescribed Vyvanse for my attention and motivation. I love it, no complaints. However, I find it doesn’t help this problem I have had for a few years now. I am stuck in a cycle of 4 different sources of dopamine.
- Food
- Masturbation
- Weed
- Vaping
Food - Luckily Vyvanse is also a BED medication so it has helped with the bingeing for sure. (I don’t have BED) But this is the worst one. Without Vyvanse I am constantly snacking, even when i’m not hungry, just bored.
Masturbation - I have been masturbating at least 5 times a week since i was 12. I came across porn at a VERY early age and haven’t been able to turn back from it (that’s a story for another day). If I do not own a vape then there is no way for me to get a quick dopamine hit (besides food), so I will masturbate whenever I need dopamine. I can no longer orgasm without porn, so that is affecting me, especially when I masturbate 10 times a day.
Weed - This isn’t really a problem for me anymore, but during my first year of university I was always bored in my room, and took an edible almost every night for three months straight. I wasn’t doing well in school and it was winter so I didn’t really leave my room. I also quit vaping at the time, i needed to feel something.
Vaping - I discovered vaping by accident the first week of my first years at uni. My friends and I had found someone’s vape on the ground at a party and i took it home with me and haven’t really stopped since. I have “quit” probably 8 times for a month or two at a time, the longest being 3.5 months, but I always found my way back.
I think my mental health and ADHD “status” is at its best when i have a vape. I don’t watch as much porn/masturbate, i don’t do weed, i tend to eat better.
I obviously know that vaping isn’t good for a person, but if it cancels out all the other things then i see this as my best option. Idk what else to do. I need some advice.