r/adhdwomen

I’m talking about your standard prescription dose of stimulants.

I’ve been on stimulants, Aderoll specifically, for 8 years but over the years my close friends and family have made statements that I’m just ‘high all the time’ and it really hurt my feelings. I never thought of it that way I was just taking my meds a prescribed.

My feelings were hurt by others comments so much so that I got off the Aderoll last year and have been trying out a multitude of different ADHD meds that just don’t compare with the productivity and engagement with my life that I previously had with Aderoll.

I want to ask people who have actually taken the med not some APRN that has just read about it. I’m looking for actual lived experiences.

What’s taking Aderoll like for you? For me, I can focus and keep a thought for longer than 5 mins and actually carry it out. Also Aderoll gives me that…static on the TV feeling inside which helps me get moving and complete my tasks instead of sitting on the couch staring at a wall lost in thought.

After seven months of experimenting other ADHD meds with no luck I’m finally on Concerta 54mg and I don’t feel anything in my body but I do notice I function a a tiny bit better but overall still feel disconnected from my life. I’m starting to wonder if the physical feeling of Aderoll is the ‘high’ everyone around me keeps talking about because I’ve only felt it with that…? I’m so conflicted internally over this.

Just another reminder to pleaseeeee do bloodwork and check your ferritin levels and do not accept numbers under 50 as “normal.”

Iron is an essential cofactor for dopamine production!!! No iron no dopamine!!! And ferritin is the protein that your body uses to store and transport iron, which is why you can’t just check your iron levels, you need to check ferritin as well.

I thought I was dealing with ADHD burnout and it turns out my ferritin was just at 30. By the way, labs will not flag you as low until you hit 11-15. The American society of hematology recognizes ferritin levels of 30 as the threshold for iron deficiency. I’ve seen some very low numbers like 5 or 10 in this sub, but you can absolutely have symptoms even if your serum iron is normal (mine was) and your ferritin is under 50.

Just throwing this out there to remind people that even though ADHD is a mental disorder, your physical health matters. I’ve been supplementing iron, Lactoferrin, and vitamin C for 3 months-ish now and the difference in my executive function is astounding. I was trudging through life unable to do dishes or laundry and now I’m actually able to get through tasks. Still have ADHD of course but I don’t feel as underwater now. Please get your bloodwork done people !!

My Mom has started watching the tv show 'This is Us' and I told her that I've been wanting to watch that for years but whenever I had the opportunity to watch it in the end I couldn't be bothered. Then I said oh maybe it's because of my ADHD in a kind of jokey way ( I've only been recently diagnosed so I'm still learning about ADHD) and she then said you can't blame everything on ADHD we can all be a like that. Then I got mad and said fine I guess I don't have ADHD then and she said No because you have ADD not ADHD because you're not hyperactive.

I've told her a million times that they don't call it ADD anymore but she just won't listen to me.

And she also said don't be like your uncle who blames everything on ADHD. Like all I was talking about was a tv show and she flips it, like I wasn't blaming my whole life on adhd, I was just talking about TV.

She acknowledges I have ADHD but won't listen to my struggles with it. Not being able to watch a tv show is one little symptom that is not really the biggest deal but when I vent about some of the harder struggles it seems like she isn't listening to me.

We've had numerous conversations about adhd and she says she always thinks about adhd as hyperactive bold boys acting out.

It just feels like she doesn't believe in the inattentive side.

I don't know what her opinion is really because she hasn't told me she doesn't believe in inattentive adhd outright but her words sometimes say otherwise.

I absolutely hate when people say we've all got some adhd in us. It's just simply not true.

Sorry for my rant but I needed to get that out or I would cry 😭 thank you

Edit: I understand that not being able to watch a tv show seems like a stupid juvenile thing to say but what I was trying to say to is I can't even do the things that I want to do, everything is so boring to me and i want to change but I can't be bothered to do anything about it. Its not about not watching a tv show it's about what it represents in my mind. Does that make sense?

Yesterday, my [F33] boyfriend [M39] was having a very bad day (as usual) and was in a state of depression. He’s been in this depression his whole life, and he gets very little reprieve.

Well, yesterday, after talking about how much calmer I’ve been since starting Vyvanse, I suggested he give it a shot. He actually agreed to try a 10 mg dose of the Vyvanse.

Yes, I know. No need to tell me how technically wrong that is. He is otherwise healthy and takes very good care of himself. 10 mg would/should not hurt him.

When I returned, he was in a great mood, said he tackled things he has never been able to tackle before, and that his depression lifted. The things he was ruminating on earlier that day, no longer felt like a crushing weight.

Later that night, while on the couch, he said “Hmm.. I feel oddly calm and relaxed for this time of night”… to which I said, “what would you usually feel at this time?” And he replied “heavy anxiety about the upcoming day.. I don’t feel that right now”

So, needless to say, Vyvanse did its job.. and could potentially change my boyfriend’s life.

But here’s the kicker… my boyfriend is a recovering alcoholic. He’s been sober for four years, and since he became sober, he adopted very poor opinions of people who medicate themselves in any way.
Anytime he sees someone acting or saying something he finds to be inappropriate or not based in logic and reality, he will turn to me and say “they’ve gotta be on meds”, or something else very negative about meds.

Today, the sadness has returned to his eyes. He’s once again anxious and overwhelmed. I offered him to try one more 10 mg dose to really cement whether this was benefitting him, and he declined.
He said he doesn’t want anymore because it’s bad for you. I responded “well, actually, studies show that people who have unmedicated ADHD can have shorter lifespans than those medicated. Partially due to the health implications of the chronic stress that comes with unmedicated ADHD” he said “no, they are bad for you”.
I asked him to find me a study to show that Vyvanse harms folks with ADHD, he said he would, but I don’t think he will. He will move on like none of this ever happened.

I think the real problem is that he feels a sense of higher value and worthiness because he can walk around and say that he is completely sober.
I think that he enjoys labelling “defective”people as medicated, and I think he fears the confidence he will lose becoming “one of them”.

I’m seeking advice on how to shift his mindset. Any studies, podcasts or anything from experts that can substantiate that unmedicated ADHD is far more harmful than Vyvanse.

I want my boyfriend to be happy. And live the life he was meant to live. The war within himself is out of control, and I fear his social biases will cause him to continue living a life of inner turmoil.

In life, I mean. I'm currently going through a season of crap, and it seems like for the past several years it's been a regular cycle of seasons of crap. We all know having ADHD is like living on hard mode already.

I'm single and childfree by choice. The only problem with this setup is that I don't think financially surviving as a single person is sustainable anymore. I make a salary that about 4 years ago would have been good (software industry), but things have increasingly been getting tight every year, and I'm fairly certain AI will replace my role within a year. Add to that - my dog is getting a malignant tumor removed (prognosis unknown until it gets tested), having just had his second knee surgery in March (two within as many years). I also had to replace my entire HVAC system that same month. I can just manage the debt for now, but if I lose my job, I will probably lose my house. I don't have the money to vacation, and anyway I actually get stressed traveling and hate traveling solo. My one day of "vacation" coming up (doing a river float with my long distance-ish friends) has now been sidelined due to my dog's recovery from surgery.

All of this makes me wonder, what am I even working towards? What is the light at the end of the tunnel? I've battled depression all my life, suicidal at times, and my current med regimen literally saved my life and is working. But the state of the USA, and the world, and my own little difficult bubble make me feel hopeless.

Forgot to pack my earplugs, im standing in the front, the speakers are so close. I guess I can say goodby to my hearing 😭
Bought those fuckers just for this…

Update:

Thanks HypeSquad! I finally called! They were not able to answer the phone. Bummer. I just set a reminder in my phone to call them tomorrow.

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I have been having health issues for a long time and I can't keep ignoring them because they might get worse. I just can't get myself to actually call my GP. Why on earth am I stuck on the couch in freeze mode just absolutely dreading the call? Hype squad, I need your help!

Where I live in the USA, the heatwave has been at least 97°F/36°C, with the humidity making it feel like 105°F/41°C at a minimum. Thunderstorms rolled in yesterday and knocked out my power.

I do not do well with heat. When I start sweating I am significantly less able to handle everything. If my capability to handle shit is a glass, being too hot means the glass is practically full.

Plus heat throws off my internal everything, especially eating. I realized this morning that I hadn't actually eaten anything since 7pm last night and that was a poptart. So no real food for over 12 hours. But I still had to go to work. EVERYTHING USES POWER.

Did I almost lose my shit in the McDonald's drive through? Yes, but I didn't and they legit sucked. Did I get food? YES.

I sent my mom a "oh shit please help baby of adult age" text and she's going to get me ice for my fridge and make sure my cats haven't melted.

AND I DIDN'T CRY OR MELTDOWN.

My bra is still DAMP from SWEATING because my car's AC is still broken (oops) but I have things handled. I have a plan to go to my parents' house if my power is not restored. Work has power and AC so I am comfortable and charging my emergency battery thing.

I do need to buy additional flashlights. Fun fact: you can create a lamp by placing a flashlight against a frosted jug filled with water. The water reflects the lights and it covers a bigger area.

I imagine the majority of you are living somewhere with this HEAT!!

When I’m at work I manage to drink plenty of water but when I have days off I’m horrible at it. I’ve had some days off. I’ve been wondering why I’ve been so tired. Why my muscles haven’t been recovering from my workouts as fast. Why taking a walk in the morning sun felt so exhausting like it was the hottest part of the day. Even walking up the stairs has been rough. Etc etc etc. I’m healthy and fairly in shape. None of that was making sense until…..

I realized I’ve been slacking on water and that’s dangerous. So if you’re like me DRINK SOME WATER! More than you probably think you need. I know many of us are incredibly gifted at forgetting to do such an important thing.

Wondering if this is an ADHD thing, becasue nobody else in my life experiences this

If I don't wake up naturally, despite possibly having 9+ hours of sleep, I feel exhausted ALL day

I slept so well last night and for around 10 hours, but because I woke up at 9am and my body likes to wake up at 11am, I feel absolutely shattered and like I could fall asleep at any moment

Im so tired of feeling tired all the time!

I have observed this at work and even from back in school days - I really hate it when something related to me is perceived incorrectly, so I will go all out to explain in detail. I have considered that it comes from the personal sense of justice side of ADHD, and is usually not received well.

Especially at work - if there's an escalation related to my work, I want to make sure that at least my manager and I are on the same page about the version of events. I feel like this isn't received well.

I will compile emails, messages, documentation, go into detail about the issue, and they will just want me to be "concise". BUT the entire issue is happening because people refused to pay attention to details? Because people refuse to read mails and documentation properly? Also you have literally asked me evaluate the issue to "make sure we can avoid this in the future"

I've been told that we shouldn't play blame games, but like I'm not. I'm just trying to explain what happened. And why is the blame game line only valid when it comes to others, but when I do something wrong, then I'm held accountable?

Idk any suggestions on this? Is there a social cue I'm missing?

I just crashed. I’ve been dealing with racing suicidal images thoughts (all intrusive) since the end of January. I have failed over 5+ meds and I am beginning to feel hopeless , I am hopeless. Working out every day, going to work - I have crashed.
I’m laying in bed missing another day of work and my brain just keeps going “I’m scared I’m scared I’m scared I’m scared”, “I don’t want to die I don’t want to die I don’t want to die”. I LOVE MY FAMILY, I HAVE TWO BEAUTIFUL BABIES I AM THINKING OF AND I AM HEARTBROKEN that I have fell apart. I feel like a scared animal stuck , frozen in fight or flight. I don’t want to leave this earth, I want to get better. I feel like I can never forgive myself for the horrific thoughts I’ve had (fear or hurting my family, myself , fear of not wanting to be here, fear of going crazy). I feel as if i have lost my mind. I feel like I have a traumatic brain injury that won’t heal. I want my life back. I fear i am too far gone. Is there any way of coming back? I am in tears as I write this, shaking.

I'm just not up for all the necessary tasks that come up. I'm afraid of having a victim mindset when I say this. I'm afraid of being selfish. But I have almost nothing to give. Kids still have to eat, be cleaned, be taught skills and boundaries. The house needs to be functional. I'd like to be able to find things. I'd like to take care of myself.

But I just can't do it all. I can't.

My husband -infuriatingly- sometimes asks me what's for dinner, and I'm just like 🤷‍♀️ beats me, bro. Sucks to suck. And we go on to have a nutritionally adequate amalgamation of whatever we have in our house, or sometimes it's frozen pizza. I've given up on consistently cooking for the time being, I make a real family meal probably twice a week.

I have a 1 year old. He's still disastrously messy when he eats. I clean the floor really well probably once every 3 days. It looks absolutely disgusting in between.

I have a 4 year old. I have limited screen time to during the 1 year old's nap every other day. I do speech therapy practice with him first. Go me on that front because that's about all I can do. He demands so much attention and I don't want to crush his soul so I try to listen to him talk all day, and play with him occasionally, but it's exhausting. I just want him to leave me alone. He STILL follows me to the bathroom if he knows I'm going. He says he just wants to be with me. Bless it.

And then there are the doom piles, kid clothes that need gone through (and my clothes), the stack of stuff that needs to be donated, my own hobby begging me for just an hour of my time once or twice a week that I can still barely get to. And I need to force myself to walk regularly or all energy leaves my body. I don't even dream of washing windows at this point, or deep cleaning anything. My bathroom stays barely acceptable. Our bedrooms are a mess. My life is objectively actually very good, but I'm surviving all the time. Just surviving. Why!!! Why can't I do more?? I try to give myself credit for the little things I am able to do, but there is so much I almost never do that really should be done more. I know my house needs better systems and I need more of a routine but I feel like I don't have the brain cells to make those things happen right now.

My husband often spends a LOT of his time off catching us up on house work and laundry. He is ADHD too and likes to get lost in his hobbies when not doing that, which I try to support because he works and does a decent amount at home. Meanwhile I'm going to therapy for years so I can learn to demand breaks for myself. I feel like I don't deserve them because I am actually so bad at being a stay at home mom. Like I wanted this but if I knew I'd feel like an absolute failure so much I might not have done it. I finally crashed out about this to my husband tonight. Maybe he will support me getting breaks more and stop questioning why I go to therapy. I'm just trying not to go insane. I want to feel different than this and I have almost tried medication multiple times and always freak myself out of it and don't. But I can't keep living like this! I genuinely don't enjoy my life most of the time! It's not okaaaayyy. Is it because my kids are young? Will I be like this forever??