u/ComplianceRev

Hey. I’m here to tell you that Pepsi is truly the ultimate drink of all. You see, it all started when I was thirsty, so I drunk Sprite. I threw it up instantly. Dr Pepper? Couldn’t even get a sip. But when I drunk that Pepsi? Oh how it changed my life! My wife came back, I got a great job WITH extra pay, and I got a mansion! The best part? Pepsi-man became my father! He took me to a university, and I passed and bought all of the bones of \[REDACTED\] as well! This is why Pepsi is genuinely the best thing that’s happened to me.