Exams Load
I hate it when you're sitting in a silent exam hall, 300 students pretending to be serious, and your brain decides 'you know what this paper needs? A random raging boner.'
I'm trying to solve questions and my D is doing its own Fourier series. Zero stimulus. No cute girls in sight. Just academic stress and my traitor of a pneis thinks it's time to salute the invigilator. I'm squeezing my thighs like I'm trying to crack walnuts while praying no one notices the tent in my khaki trousers.
But the real villain arc? I remember that one time in second year during a brutal 3-hour paper. The exam was so intense I was sweating, racing to finish, adrenaline iko tops... and suddenly, mid-calculation, zero hands, zero touching I nutted. Hands-free. Full release right there in the exam hall like it's crazy.
Felt it coming too late. That warm betrayal spreading in my boxers while I'm writing about policies. I sat there frozen, post-nut clarity hitting harder than the exam stress. Had to finish the last 45 minutes sitting in my own mess, praying it didn't soak through and leave evidence.
Walked out of that hall looking like I'd seen God and the devil at the same time. Never confessed to anyone. To this day, that unit still has my DNA on file somewhere in the archives.
Uni was hard, man.