I’m not sure if I’m overthinking this, my sister says no but my partner says I am so I would really appreciate an outsiders opinion.
TL/DR best friend of 16 years forgot my birthday and is avoiding messages about meeting up. Are we friend breaking up?
I’ve been close friends with someone for about 16 years. I’ve always considered her my best friend but I’m not 100% sure I’ve been hers the whole time. We’ve never been the type to talk every single day, but we had our own little routine, usually messaging a couple of times a week and meeting up about once a month. We always just picked up where we left off and it never felt awkward between us.
Now, the last time we saw each other was December, but she’s changed jobs and is going through an intense training period which has been leaving her exhausted. I’ve given her space to adjust to this new role and haven’t pushed to meet up or anything.
It was my birthday 2 weeks ago and she didn’t message me at all on the day or messaged me about my birthday since. Again, I gave her the benefit of the doubt with her new job and everything but it really did hurt. I didn’t want to say anything about it over text so I invited her out to lunch since she now works in basically the building next door to my work. She just said “not sure if i can but will see” so I offered to do tea since we haven’t seen each other for that long.
I then saw a post about the new Kindle update disconnecting older models from amazon (no idea if that’s true) so knowing she has an old kindle she uses every day, i let her know not to update it in case it breaks. She responded to that just to say thanks.
So it feels like she’s ignoring anything that involves actually seeing me or having a proper conversation, but will respond to other unimportant messages.
I haven’t said anything to her about it yet because I don’t want to seem dramatic or clingy, but it’s been playing on my mind especially because this isn’t how our friendship normally is and she hasn’t forgotten my birthday in 16 years.
Bear in mind, I have no other friends outside of work. I just have my partner, sister, mum and dad who I can talk to about this. Maybe that’s why it’s hitting so hard because my circle is so small??
Am I overthinking this, or does this seem like she’s deliberately avoiding me? Should I call her out on it/say something in a nice way? Just accept that we’re friend breaking up?