u/ConstantSea3332

Hi everyone!

I've been wanting to cut off all ties with my genetic parents but I'm still not sure if I'm being reasonable. What do you think? Am I overreacting? Here's a few things from the top of my mind that come up when I think about reasons:

since I was like 12 I closed myself off emotionally from my genetic parents. What I mean by that is that I stopped telling them about anything happening in my life and how I felt as a coping mechanism. Even as a small child I found out that if I don't try to please them in every possible way and adapt my behavior to fit their wishes, there would be shouting arguments with namecalling. It doesn't sound like much, but I'd say I'm a highly sensitive person (much more than anyone in my genetic family at least, even though I suppress my feelings), so whenever there was tons of shouting, I would be on the verge of crying as a child. I could never understand how they could be such horrible people to my genetic sibling and vice versa after which they would laugh together as if they hadn't just insulted each other
my genetic father was pretty much physically and emotionally unavailable throughout my childhood (despite being unemployed for a significant part of it and genuinely having MORE than enough time to have just a basic relationship with me). Tbh he feels like a stranger to me
my genetic mother has had episodes where she would just go off on me, e.g., I was making 2 toasts one evening cause I was feeling hungry and she came to the kitchen and started shouting about how horrible I was for not asking if anyone else was also hungry. She also called me a 'disappointment' which, well, isn't a thing you should every tell your child. Other time I turned on the lights in the back of the car because I needed to look at some of my school notes. She started hollering about how I should have asked her if I could do that and then she went on to degrade me as a person generally. However, later on she would never have any issues with me turning on the lights
my genetic sibling is a crystal clear copy of my genetic parents except they're more pushy and don't respect my boundaries even more. For instance, when genetic parents were out of the house, the genetic sibling started following me and kept repeating "what did I do to you?!" over and over in a span of like 3 hours (I literally went on an hour walk to just escape from them)(they asked that because, like mentioned above, I disconnected myself emotionally at the age of 12 from the genetic family). It only ended when they cornered me in our shared room where I was pushed to one corner trying to protect myself and I called my genetic mother. After both genetic parents returned home the whole thing was sweeped under the rug and the genetic sibling didn't face any consequences for their actions

Trigger warning: homophobia

When I came out to my parents as an older teen (but literally still a child) regarding my sexuality, they told me that I should question this idea and that I'm mistaking attraction with just wanting to be friends with people of the same-gender. I asked them if they questioned their sexuality at my age and they said with fear on their faces "no". Then they went on a rant about how gay couples need extra thick condoms because men act like wild animals when it comes to sex and asked me if I'd be the man or the woman in the relationship. Mind you, I was a TEEN! Oh and they also told me 2 stories about the relationships of queer people they knew with one they completely dismissed because it was long-distance and the other having a tragic ending. Yay!

However, I feel like I should add that most of the time they are normal. Frankly, I don't show them any emotions and try to keep quiet so that they won't use my words against me and it's hard to enter into an argument with somebody who acts like a ghost. Sometimes they are even kind-ish, especially now. But I can't shake off the past

I would really appreciate your opinions about this <3

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