First time tripping was on 10mg of both 4homet and 4hodet
Hello all, this is my first foray into this kinda stuff and I wanted to document what was a weird trip for me. So, for context, I’m a 19yo college student who has, since ever hearing about them, been curious about psychs. Not just the normal Google search or whatever, I would spend hours sometimes just delving deeper into rabbit holes of different psychs, trip visualizations, trip stories, whatever it was. Anyways, I found an online seller and on a whim, since they were on some sale or something, bought 5 pills of 10mg 4homet and 10mg 4hodet.
Of course they took a few days to get here, and since I’ve been rotting away in my room for the past couple weeks since it’s summer, the anticipation was killing me. It was a different sort of thrill from other packages I’d order online, like a sex toy or whatever. Well, the day it came (today) I was particularly bored and the only meaningful event for the day was the package. So, I did some early preparation and when it came I was excited. Which kinda fucking sucks, looking back at it, considering that I’ve never done psychs before in my entire life and I was holding what I knew was a powerful fucking pill.
Well whatever, since I had chosen to try a mix of the 2 different psychs I thought I’d split it in half. Well, I was feeling hungry first, so I decided to eat my fair share of Greek food, from which I felt quite full. And after I had eaten, I was sitting in the kitchen wondering what I would do. And after all that aforementioned thought and prep work I did to ensure my setting was what I considered “fine”, I said fuck it and took the whole pill for some reason. I think it was a mix of excitement, since I had never tripped and I would finally “understand” what it was like and a feeling of nervousness of an unknown dose I was taking.
So after I swallowed the pill, it was only going to be me and my brother that night, and he had no clue and should still have no clue. I don’t really know, it’s whatever. So I considered chilling with him for a little bit as he played hearts of iron 4. Well, I was watching him for a little bit as I sat there, and after about 20 or 30 minutes I start feeling a profound sense of like, this dirty happiness. Do you know the feeling in your cheeks when you laugh too hard and have been smiling very hard? It felt like that but that’s what was making me smile. It was a very weird sensation to say the least.
Well, as I continued to watch and as the trip got more and more intense, I started to freak out because, who knew that taking a visually heavy psychedelic would make you see shit. Unfortunately, it also gave me a really bad case of wanting to hurl, which persisted, strongly at points, until the end of the trip. I was now at some weird place where, I felt oddly lonely knowing that this exploration into this unknown space was going to probably be just me. Not considering the fact that it was a very ridiculous exploration in the first place, I should’ve just tried shrooms or something first. Well, as my send off, I went down my stairs and said hi to my dogs. But I knew shit was getting really fucked when I realized my dog was starting to contort and my walls were shifting all around me.
I made my way back up the stairs, and before I get to my room there’s a large upstairs loft area with a couch and a TV. I know I didn’t spend much time looking, but I gazed at my carpet and literally saw like the most average psychedelic looking artwork move across the floor. When I say that psychedelic artwork is extremely accurate to some of the shit I was seeing, I’m not lying. It was kind of grand and vast, it felt like it extended beyond just the room. I wish I stayed just a little bit longer and saw it, but I was terrified of hurling, so I made my way to my room.
As a side note, I have this very weird grown hate for throwing up. I think it’s called emetophobia or something? I’ve gotten it more as I’ve lived. It’s also the reason I tend to not drink liquors anymore, and also why I don’t take weed edibles.
Well, I get to my room, and I sit as if I go on my computer. I don’t know where I got this feeling from, but as I turned on my computer I felt like I was going to be sucked in or something?.. so I kind of felt like I had nothing to do and sat on my bed. I was already overwhelmed, but I spend a lot of my time on the computer and one of my ways of coping with stress was kinda torn away from me, for no reason other than my own.
So I sit on my bed. For context, I have a window right next to my bed. And as I’m sitting on my bed, the only words that can really describe anything I was feeling was “profoundly weird”. For instance, I had this very random thought I slipped on a banana or something. And then I felt the anxiety as if I had slipped on the banana. And lastly, all within like a moment of each other, I picture vividly that I slipped on a banana. This doesn’t “sound” that bad until it’s random shit out of a hat every other 4 seconds. I’d move my feet and I’d feel grass in my bed sheets, and then I’d get squirmy and feel slimy, it was all intensely, and profoundly weird.
Oh yea, I forget to mention some stuff. The visuals were ridiculous. At points in my peak (later than this) I could seriously see the wall flipping back on itself. Shit like seeing it breathe, move, whatever have you, it was all happening. Probably the most interesting part of the entire experience imo. I know 4 ho met is meant to be a more visual psych than others, but it really is something to be experienced. Not saying you should, I don’t know if I’m touching the other 4 pills I have, maybe I will maybe I won’t. Anyways, I’d also feel these very weird prinkly needle stabs all over me, as if a tiny portion of my body fell asleep and I had tried moving it. I don’t know the name of this but I knew it was normal so I was fine. I also saw tracers and afterimages. I was able to rationalize a lot of my thoughts, and I made a lot of choices I was proud of for keeping myself safe, though my thoughts were often “negotiated” with the trip. It was give and take, I’d realize a feeling I had was part of the trip, so I let it go, and whenever I got a weird feeling I’d have to take it in. It was like being dealt a constant barrage of card hands, but everytime it was like a new card game entirely. The best example I have is when I felt like I was intruding somewhere. It felt as if I had just walked in on someone changing or something. It was an intensely and profoundly weird feeling, and I’d let go and get new feelings the next few moments. The words don’t do it justice. At some of the worst points it was nearly impossible to not hurl, I don’t know how I held on LOL. In all honesty, the best I could compare it to is the feeling of a lucid dream. You could never know what comes next but you have to be along for the ride.
Anyways, off my shpeal, I’m trying my hardest to enjoy the trip in bed. At points, I am truly enjoying myself. I am basically in shock and awe that this really is what that feels like. And at other points, just as quick as the good points, I felt extremely nauseous and anxious. I would feel as if I had done nothing wrong, enjoying my trip, and then my body would completely send the signal that I have to feel as if my hand had touched the most elastic rubber or some dumb shit and the feelings of anxiousness would creep back, along with the feeling to puke. This kind of got really intense, especially since i would look out the window and see the sky and trees turn into these weird shapes that resembled like some sort of person who was watching..? I still can’t explain the feeling, but looking outside my window was immensely weird, don’t know if I liked it, so I stopped.
And so, before I think i am going to hurl, I try and settle my anxiousness by going to one of the last coping methods I have left other than just curling up in a ball and freaking out, and i open my phone. I was kind of hoping I wouldn’t, since going on your phone felt like a waste of a trip, but I’m telling you if you can have a good trip watching videos on your phone, it’s worth it. I spend a few minutes on TikTok and reels and I’m having a much better time. I will say, the faces would freak me out though. It felt as if my brain were processing faces like early AI would. Sometimes I’d hear talking but their mouth was closed. Sometimes theyd have their eyes closed when they shouldn’t be. It was weird. All very weird. I liked the visuals, but I’m not so sure about the faces, they seemed off to me.
Well, it wasn’t long though because I realized I was properly peaking and I needed to take a shower and relax my body. I warm it up, and this is kind of where my trip turned extremely weird. I’m kind of sitting there waiting for the shower to warm up, and I’m kind of freaking out, so I decided to put on some music. I start listening to one of my favorite songs and so I’m realizing that I should’ve had more music prepared for this. So as I’m sitting, I’m kinda avoiding looking at the big mirror in my bathroom because I don’t want to freak myself out.
And then I get this odd feeling that I simply can’t explain other than “I don’t”. Not even a rational thought could really expel this really intense feeling, and so I kind of try and push it and enjoy what Is happening and then I keep getting this feeling. It’s very weird. At some point I was debating these feelings with myself and the trip and we agreed that, since I don’t want to, I’ll stay in this waiting room area, the bathroom, until I got my shit together and plunged into the shower. But I knew I didn’t have a lot of time for this “agreement” because I felt it intensify if I was slacking, like not taking off my clothes or checking the temperature. At this point, I wasn’t at all checking the time. Time didn’t really matter, I was just kinda waiting for the trip to end since I didn’t think I’d be this nauseous. And as I get in, immediately I feel everything 10x in intensity, volume, feeling, etc.. It was also at this point I hear a very loud ringing from outside everything as well as, whenever I close my eyes, I’d see a blinding light.
So I’m sitting in the tub, listening to my liked songs on shuffle since I didn’t have anything prepared, and I decide to sit down. And it’s at this point I’m feeling like I’ve failed. I wanted to enjoy this trip as much as I can, I talked myself into enjoying it, even audibly responding to feelings and hallucinations with awe instead of fear. But I’m at this point where I’m butt ass naked sitting in my shower, hotly pouring water over my badly hurting stomach as I’m unable to close my eyes or keep my eyes open. And it’s also at this point that, even though I failed, I still decided to indulge in what the trip had to offer for me. And for a large part, the nausea went away after I made that “brave” realization, though I’d still get queasy looking at the bright light when I closed my eyes.
I’ll also say, I swapped from liked songs to Minecraft music between this time because I was getting anxious from some of the songs, no surprise, and I realized I could ground myself in the nostalgia from some of those songs. Kind of a pussy trick, but I was realized if I want to enjoy it this is how.
So I sit back, and wait for it to cool off. I turn off the shower water and keep myself warm with a towel in the tub, and gaze at the walls in my bathroom. It was all weird. I felt entirely neutral at this point, even bordering on feeling good. So by this time I had left the tub. By now, I had taken the pill at 7:00 ish and it was now 10:00 ish, so a majority of the peaking had subsided. What followed was a beautiful trip.
I went back to my bed, and instead of being covered in anxiety and whatever vast array of weird feelings, I was able to simply relax. It was odd honestly. I felt like I had braved some sort of daring mountain and fallen off the edge, as if I had failed, but stood at a rest spot and was able to relax. It was very weird. I still don’t know how to feel about it, whether I took a bad amount or whether I overcame some personal issue, I have zero clue. But I pondered as I sat, and decided to call my friend up. I told him my crazy experience, and that was basically the end of the trip. I rode out the high, looking at stunning visuals on my computer, since I wasn’t terrified of it anymore. Currently where I’m at right now, by the way.
This is a seriously unfathomable trip. I don’t know if it was just the research chems or if all psychs are like this but I genuinely have no words. It felt like a shitpost, like everything in the end was a joke of some sort. My queasy ass in the bathtub geeking at my wall as I’m afraid to keep my eyes open and closed at the same time. I wanted to call people, but then I was afraid of absolutely losing it on call since I had no clue if they were going to be cool with me or not. Even as I sit here writing this out, it all felt like a dream that I just woke from, even though I glided my last bit down.
For absolutely no reason at all I braved a profoundly weird pill from some online shop by myself at home sitting in my fucking tub because I thought it would be exciting. What the fuck was I thinking?
Also, you guys can ask me anything, I’m bound to respond if it’s within like a couple days of this post upload. I’d also like to ask anyone who’s made it this far, is it possible to reduce the queasiness? Or is this a pattern between psychs? If it’s a given with some of these substances, I might have to hold off on trying them again for the time being, or at least taking a much smaller dose. Also, what’s the kind of relative dose for, say, mushrooms? I’d like to stay a little far from something as intense as this for quite a bit until I can handle my shit. Hmm what else… Oh yea I have no clue if this is where this is supposed to go. I just wanted people to see this honestly, it felt quite lonely taking this by myself and I don’t want to take it to the grave.