Should I break it off
This is a bit of a long one so strap (no pun intended) in. (Also for a bit of context we're both neurodivergent — she's AuDHD and I have ADHD and possibly autism as well so I try to use as little subtext as possible and state exactly how I feel). I matched with this girl on a lesbian dating app in December and we've been talking every since. We've gone on 2 dates and will be going a third one tomorrow. Every date we've been on has been an event that she wanted to go. Even the restaurant we went to before going to the second event was one she wanted to go to. I really wanted to go to another but because she wanted to go to a different restaurant we went to that one instead. There was an event I REALLY wanted to go to today because it only comes to LA like every six months and I told her about it weeks in advance and I made it EXPLICITLY clear that this was something I was really looking forward to and it's something I really wanted to do but everytime I brought it up she was finicky about whether or not she would go. We're going to the ren faire tomorrow and a few days ago she asked if she should take the 9th off (today, day of the event I wanted to go to) and we could do the ren faire then or if pushing it to the 10th would be ok. I told her the 10th is fine and I would just stay in LA a little longer (I don't live in LA but she does. Keep this in mind bc it's important). Like a day or so later I asked if she would be able to do the event I wanted to do bc she was thinking of taking the 9th off anyway but then she replies that she only said that bc she wanted to get up early for Ren faire and not stay out late the night before so she can't do the event. That was 3 days ago and I haven't talked to her since, something I haven't done at all since we starting talking in Dec bc I always keep the convo going, something she doesn't do. I go out of my way, travel THREE PLUS HOURS just to see her and go to every event SHE wants to do and she can't even do the same bc it's a slight inconvenience for her. The whole reason I'm even in LA rn is because of her and the event SHE wants to go to. I'm going to the ren faire for her not me. And it's not just this that bothers me. She has AWFUL communication issues.
On average she takes about a day to even respond to a simple fucking text and the longest she's taken was almost a week. Communication issues are a HUGE red flag for me and one of my biggest turn offs. Because if you really liked me you wouldn't take days to respond or talk to me. You can watch and like my story, post to yours, but you can't even take <5 minutes to respond to me? I've talked to her about it and I told her it really bothers me and the only excuse she could come up with is "I suck at texting sorry." The communication was already one thing but her not wanting to go to something I really wanted to go to was honestly my last straw. We haven't discussed what we are or what we're even looking for and Idk if she's talking to other girls or not. And another huge red flag is that she's constantly posting songs about missing an ex on her notes on Insta. She buys me stuff, knows about my shitty family and has comforted me when I've cried to her about them, we share a lot of the same interests and hobbies and familial issues and just overall have a lot in common and have pretty good chemistry, but I'm just not sure if the pros outweigh the cons.
We see each other at the ren faire tomorrow and Idk what to do. I wear my emotions right on my face so it's very hard to disguise how I'm feeling and how irritated I am at her. I'm def gonna talk to her about the communication, my frustration with the event thing, our feelings and what we are, but Idk if I should just end everything atp or hope she can learn to compromise and get better at communicating. Genuinely what do I do?
TLDR: I've been talking to this girl for months, she has abysmal communication issues, we only go to events she wants to do that I have to travel 3 hours for, despite bringing it up multiple times and weeks in advance she keeps refusing to go to something I really wanted to do. I feel like there's very little compromising when it comes to the things I want to do. We have good chemistry, have a lot in common, and she's a safe space, but Idk if this is worth it.