u/Content-Bee-6628

I will be a month out from surgery this coming Friday. Everything was going really well, like unexpectedly well. I had my first check up at 2 weeks out and I told her I was actually shocked at how good I felt (I have POTS and EDS, I’ve had a dozen surgeries and I never heal easily, almost always have complications) and I was ready to start getting a little more active. About an hour after that appointment my boyfriend calls me: he just lost his job. Completely out of the blue, he’d been there a long time, they just decided to dissolve his position. He’s taken it hard, especially because he’s the breadwinner in this relationship, I’m on disability. I’m trying to be as supportive as possible and he’s doing everything he can to minimize the impact on me and our life and living situation, but the sudden upheaval is radically set me back. Swelling came back, pelvic pain is back, inner incision at the top of my vaginal canal hurts, pooping has become painful again, I even started having rectal pain which I gather is probably pelvic related. I basically feel like I’m going through post surgical pain with no post surgical medication. I’m maxed out on everything, NSAIDs are hurting my stomach, Tylenol is giving me rebound migraines, and I’m way too far out from surgery to expect anything more helpful. I’m trying breathing exercises, guided meditation, back to more bed rest, I even tried a muscle relaxer (against my better judgement as I’ve never tolerated them well) knowing they’d probably suggest it, but I was right because I was a nauseous zombie for a day and it did nothing for pain. I’m heartbroken to be in this position when I was so excited to feel like I was finally thriving after this life changing surgery, now the more pain I’m in the more I’m stressing out, but the more stress I feel the worse my pain is, and it’s getting unmanageable. I’m kind of at a loss as to what to do.

I’m almost 2 weeks out from a hysterectomy following an endometriosis diagnosis. I’m so incredibly happy with my decision. I’d spent particularly the past year and a half in constant pain, bloated, having terrible gastric issues, really only dressing for comfort, and towards the end I could tell it was visibly written on my face how miserable I felt because I couldn’t hide it anymore. I rarely went out, friendships faded because plans felt impossible, my world really shrunk to my dog, my partner and our apartment. Within the first week I could feel what an incredible difference it had made, there was one night I cried happy tears to my boyfriend that even though the surgical pain was there the weight sitting in abdomen was gone, and I didn’t even remember what that felt like.

Now I want to spoil myself a little bit, I guess you could say step into this new body I finally feel a little more in control of. I’ve made myself a hair appointment to get something fresh and different, but I’m still looking for ideas. Do I splurge a little on a fabulous dress and fancy shoes for a special night out? Get a new tattoo? I’m really open to anything ideas, I just want to mark a new chapter and move forward with confidence I haven’t felt in a long time.